The Break - Chapter 16

Chapter 16 Suddenly, Schnieder was on the bus with Pete and Ronnie. His eyes darting quickly from side to side, he quickly surveyed the bus. “What time is it?” He asked brusquely. “Damn, dude.” Pete responded. “Good Morning to you, too. “I said, ‘what time is it’” Schiender said in a voice that told Pete he was in one of his moods. “It’s noon.” Pete responded trying to determine whether he wanted to say anything else. Between Schnieder’s freakiness and Ronnie’s surly morning attitude, it was not shaping up to be a great bus trip. “Where the fuck are the other two?” Schnieder asked impatiently. Pete looked over to see if Ronnie was going to take part. Seeing him sitting and staring out the window, he knew he was on his own to deal with Schnieder. “Not sure.” Pete responded trying to keep his part of the conversation to the absolute minimum. “Why the fuck not?” Schnieder continued to harshly question. “What? I … uh …” Pete started. “You dumbass. Do you know anything?” Continued Schnieder. “Back of Pete, Schnieder.” Ronnie interjected without turn his head. “It’s your job to make sure the bus leaves on time, not his. That’s why we pay you.” “Look, you little piece of …” Schnieder began. That moment, Ronnie turned and stared directly into Schneider’s eyes. Unflinching, he stared at Schnieder as if he could channel enough energy to bore a hole through him. “Finish that sentence,” Ronnie said evenly. “And you can walk your ass back to Colorado.” Taking a moment to survey the situation, Schnieder saw the look in Ronnie’s eyes. Knowing the kid half his age was absolutely serious, Schnieder began to soften. As he did, he realized that he was being a jerk. “Damn, Ronnie.” Schnieder said. “It’s cool.” “All right, Schnieder.” Ronnie responded in a civil tone. “Let’s just give them a few minutes. I think I saw Ben in the lobby.” “Yeah, and if Ben’s there.” Pete said jovially. “You know Ass has to be pretty close.” This comment drew a glare from Ronnie, but Pete just shrugged it off. That’s just the way he was. Ronnie was intense and moody, Ben was quiet and introverted and Ass was disciplined and reliable. Pete was the one that kept things lose. All the boys had a great sense of humor, that’s one of the things that kept them close. But it was Pete that delivered most of the punch lines, even in the worst situations. “No doubt, eh?” Schnieder said with a hint of a smile. Seeing that Schnieder’s mood was improving, Pete turned an eye back to Ronnie. “You gonna snap out of it, bitch?” Pete asked. “Or you gonna ride the whole way to Missoula with you tight little panties in a bunch?” Schnieder burst out laughing and Ronnie even managed a smile. It wasn’t what Pete said necessarily, it was how he said it. The smile and the infectious laugh were Pete’s trademark. And usually, his timing was dead on. “Hey, here comes Ben.” Ronnie said. The other two hunched over to get a view of Ben walking out of the front door of the hotel. Expecting to see Ass, they all kept watching the front door. Until they heard Ben’s footsteps on the steps of the bus. “Ass have to take a shit?” Pete asked. “What do you mean?” Ben asked as he quickly looked around the bus. “You mean he’s not here?” The three others exchanged a bewildered look. Simultaneously, they turned back to look at Ben. They saw the worried look on his face. After a palatable pause, Ronnie was about to break the silence when they heard the sound of footsteps on the bus steps. Ass ascended the top of the stairs and turned to see the four others staring at him. Taken aback, he wasn’t sure what to say. No one else knew what to say either. “What are you looking at?” Ass finally broke the silence. “You.” Ben replied looking at him with a concerned look. “Where have you been?” Ass turned his eyes away from Ben and addressed his response to the others. “I went for a run.” Ass responded and with a shrug he continued. “Guess I went a little farther than I planned.” “Dude, what the fuck?” Pete asked. Ass was drenched in sweat. His white University of Colorado t-shirt was actually dripping and there were two circles of red one his chest. “I dunno.” Ass replied. It was as if he was trying to understand his appearance. He took a closer look at himself. His shoes were covered I mud. As were, his socks and calves. Like his shirt, his shorts had reached their capacity to hold the sweat that had drained from his body. He pulled the neck of his shirt open and look down. “Holy shit.” He exclaimed. “My nipples are bleeding. That’s never happened before. I guess they got a little chaffed while I was running.” “How far did you run?” Pete continued since he seemed to be the only one that cold talk. “After I turned back around I ran past a sign that said Billings – 9 miles.” Ass responded. “I think I must have run like twenty or twenty-one miles.” “You what?” Ben asked finally finding his voice. “Are you that …” “We’ll talk about it later, Ben.” Ass said cutting him off. Seeing the look Ass had given him, Ben decided not to push it. If Ass said they would talk later, then they would talk later. Looking around, he realized that he didn’t really want to have the conversation in front of everyone either. “I just needed to do some thinking.” Ben heard Ass continuing. It was as if Ben was outside his body. He floated around the group, studying the look on each face. Then he felt it. All the concern for Ass, all the focus all the attention all the concerned conversation buzzing back and forth made it perfectly clear to him. Before he really knew he was talking he heard his voice. “Let’s talk about it now.” “What?” Ass responded. “Really? In front of everyone?” “Why not.” Ben said gaining courage. “They are our best friends, our family really.” Ass hesitated. Looking deeply into Ben’s eyes, he saw it. He saw the love. Just as they were while they were playing, they were in synch. “What’s going on with you two?” Pete asked. “Ben and I are in love.” Ass said matter-of-factly. Ben was more shocked than any of the other three. They group exchanged bewildered looks. No one had any idea how to respond. “Problem is.” Ass continued. “I’m not gay. Any of you guys have any ideas how what we can do about that?” ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- He cleared his throat and stepped slowly up to the microphone. “We the Thunder Ridge High graduating class 1971,” Frankie began. “Are faced with a world of uncertainty. The war effort in Vietnam continues. We have problems with labor unions, inflation, recession, race riots. Our challenge is to set forth from here and take the lead in making America great. We need to become involved. Join the Peace Corp, work to pass the 27th amendment. I myself have joined the Marine Corps. I leave tomorrow for Paris Island and then hopefully I will be sent to Vietnam to protect the freedom of the Vietnamese people.” Frankie pause to let the crowd absorb his statement. He had not told anyone that he was now a Marine. “I know that all the protesters out there are saying this is an unjust war. That America is ruining Vietnam. That we are killing innocents. I say not. What better cause than the cause of freedom? What better war than the war against communism? It is our time to keep America great and to preserve freedom for all people!” He stepped back for the podium and scanned the crowd. Waiting for the cheers to erupt. Much to his dismay, it was not cheers he heard but jeers. “BABY KILLER!” One classmate screamed. “Make love, not war man.” Another added. Several other remarks could be heard mixed in with the very loud boos. “What the hell?” Frankie thought. “Is everyone here high on pot?” He stepped back up to the microphone. “What is wrong with you people? Don’t you want to make the world a better place?” Then she invaded his thoughts. Totally occupying everything. He had to push it aside to deal with the issues of the here and now. “Look, America use to stand for something.” He said as he brushed aside every thought of her. “It used to be the land of the free and the home of the brave. We said it and we meant it. Now that a few of those hippie protesters start saying “Turn on and tune out” all of you are ready to pack it in and be satisfied with things as they are. We need … “Fuck off, Mr. Establishment.” “Booooo….” Frankie was drowned out he could not be heard above the din. That was it. He couldn’t take anymore. He just turned and walked away from the podium. He could not believe how his speech was received. He had played it over again and again in his head and every time it ended in a chorus of cheers. He had been wrong, totally wrong. Much like he had been with everything he had done in the past month. Right after prom he broke up with her. He didn’t want her to worry while he was gone. Now he knew it had been the biggest mistake he had ever made. He had to get out of here now. “No, really I got to get the fuck out of here. Amid the continuing chorus of boos, he quickly turned and jumped over the rail and onto the football field. As soon as he hit he was running full stride to her house. He made it to Elmcrest Road. He ran to her front door and began pounding. “Debbie, Debbie.” He yelled in agony. “Please come to the door.” He pounded and pounded. There was no answer. He continued pounding. “Debbie please…” After what seemed to be an eternity, Debbie came to the door. “What do you want?” She asked. “I thought you said it was over.” Totally relived that she finally answered the door, Frankie simply said, “I was wrong.” “What?” Debbie asked. His head sunk as he looked at the floor of the wooden porch. “I was wrong.” He said almost silently. “What are you saying?” Debbie asked. “I am saying that you mean more to me than I can possible say.” “Then why did you break it off?” She asked in a very bitter tone. “Why?” She said searchingly. “I…I…I…” he started. “You what?” She asked. “You took me out and flat out told me that nothing would happen between us. You said that.” She said. Then more emphatically she said, “YOU SAID THAT!” Stunned and humbled Frankie couldn’t think of how to reply. He didn’t know what to say. Finally, he said, “I know, I know.” He started. “But since then I have spent a lot of time thinking and I was wrong.” Slowly he moved toward her. He looked directly into her eyes and said, “I was wrong. What else can I say? Can I tell you that every waking moment you are in my thoughts? That you invade my dreams every night. That you are all I ever think about. All I care about. You are my everything. My world. You fill a need that I have had for a very long time.” “Are you serious?” Debbie asked when he took a moment to breath. “You came and told me that we had bad timing. That everything you had said in the past was wrong and now you’re trying to tell me that you didn’t mean it?” Frankie considered what Debbie was saying to him. He could understand her confusion but he couldn’t understand why she didn’t believe him. “Well…uh…well…yeah.” He said. “I already said I was wrong and I meant it.” “You think you can walk over here and just tell me that you were wrong and sorry and I would just open my arms and accept you back?” Frankie took a moment to consider what Debbie was saying. “Well…uh…I mean…well… yeah...I mean…you know…” “No, I don’t know. I just don’t get it.” “What do you mean?” “I mean you told me. You told me that it was over between us. That it had all been a mistake. That you just couldn’t continue.” Frankie look down and kicked at an invisible dirt speck on the porch. “I know, but I didn’t mean it. I just…I…” “You just what?” “What I said…well I…well I was wrong.” Frankie said. “Since then I have done a lot of thinking…” “You’ve done some thinking?” She asked viciously. Stunned, Frankie was totally taken aback. This was Debbie. Debbie the object of his affection. The most beautiful woman he had ever met. The woman he was going to … “Well?” She asked again. “Well this. I made mistakes but one thing I can tell you is that I want you, I need you. We have to be together. I mean it.” “You want me, you need me?” She asked even more viciously than before. “I’ve moved on.” “What?” Frankie asked. “I’ve moved on.” She said flatly. Frankie thought for a moment. He didn’t know quite how to react. He thought and thought for what seemed an eternity. This wasn’t the way he expected the conversation to go. He had expected her to be as excited as he was. “You’ve moved on?” Frankie asked, he voice crackling with emotion. “What about me?” “What about you?” She asked. “You told me you weren’t interested in me any more.” “I…well…I was…it’s…I just wanted to let you down easy.” He replied weakly. “Let me down easy?” She asked incredulously. “Yeah, I didn’t want to make you wait …” “Make me wait?” She asked indignantly. “Yeah, make you wait until …” His voice trailed off. “Until what?” She asked as her eyes look at his face, searching. “That’s not important.” He said quickly not wanting to change the conversation. The most important thing is that I need you. I have to have you. I must … I … well …I want …” “What are you saying?” She asked after the stammering became intolerable. “I’m saying that the things I thought should keep us apart don’t matter any more.” He paused trying to get his lips to form the correct words. “I mean…it’s…well we should be together – even if it is for a short time. I just …” “You just what?” She asked harshly. “I just have to have you. I mean it.” He said quietly. “I will do anything, anything for you. I will …” “You’ll what?” She continued questioning. Frankie was so focused on trying to communicate his desires, he complete missed Debbie’s hostile body language. Arms folded tightly across her chest, she glared directly at his face as he spoke. “I’ll do anything you ask, just to be with you.” He pled without looking to see if his words were having the desired effect. “I mean it, anything. Just ask me. I will do it. Please, you just have to ask.” “Are you telling me you love me?” She prompted. “Maybe….uh…maybe…well…I’m not sure, but I would like to find out.” Frankie managed to say. “Really, I would like to explore things with you.” “Explore?” “Yes, I mean it. I want to try. It’s worth it. I mean it. I want this to happen. Please, please let it happen. Let’s try.” “Screw you.” Debbie said. “What?” “I said screw you coming here and messing with my mind. Coming here telling me you will do anything and you want to explore.” Debbie said angrily. “Screw you.” “No…please…” “Please what?” “Please, it can work. We can be …” “We can be what?” “We can be together – even for a short time. Please, please give me the chance. You know you want me as much as I want you.” “What?” “I know it. You want it as bad as I do. You want us to be together. I could tell when you touch me. I know. I know….” He tailed off voicelessly. “You don’t know shit.” “Yes, I do. I know what I want now. It’s you. And I know you want me. I know it. You just need to admit it.” “Screw you.” Debbie said as she slammed the door in his face. Tags: Fiction, Online Book, Rebeleyeball, Paul Gavin Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.