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Friday, March 31, 2006

Still plugging away

Just thought I'd let you know that I am still out there plugging away for you, my loyal reader. My latest research project is to establish blogs at other places and link back to myself. I am trying to see if there's any truth to the whole "the more links you have, the more traffic you'll get". This effort hasn't seemed to have had any effect so far.

Here's a little tidbit on Google Adwords. Earlier this week, I discontinued my ad campaign at Adwords. There has definitely been a drop off in traffic, but it wasn't like the traffic I was getting from my ad campaign was helping at all. I have no hard information to base this on, but here are my observations. A

Almost since I started blogging, I had a statcounter on my blog. I checked my statcounter several times a day and I could never match the hits I saw on my counter and the clicks that Google recorded. I sent the following email to Google:

How is it that I see that my ad has been clicked on 7 times in one day, yet neither of the 2 hit trackers I have on my web page have recorded the visits? Take today for example, Adwords shows that I have 2 clicks from searches and 5 clicks from content. Making a total of 7 clicks which I was charged $1.26. However, both my hit counters have only registered 4 visitors for today and no of them have come from Google adwords.

Here is an excerpt from Google's response:

Additionally, Google's reporting technology may record clicks that other web tracking programs may miss. Some tracking programs may not register clicks that occur while the destination site is down, or they may have limitations on the kinds and sources of clicks that they detect.

Of the 255 clicks I was charged for on Adwords, I could only account for 210 on my statcounter. Additionally, none of the clicks ever loaded more than one page. In fact, the none of the "visitors" ever stayed long enough to record a length of stay greater than zero seconds - not a single one.

One of my subscriptions is for the Interactive Advertising Bureau newsletter. A short time ago they had an article that stated one advertiser hired an outside auditor look into the quality of clicks from Adwords. Guess what - the auditor determined that 30% of the clicks were fraudulent - 30%! The estimated that 15% of the clicks at Yahoo! were fraudulent.

You may be aware, Blogger is owned by Google and it is one of the only blog sites that allows the automated set up of blogs. You know, all the blogs you see that have nonsense formatted like paragraphs are up for bots to go through and "click" on ads. Question is - what do we want to do about it? Personally, I decided to give up on Adwords. I am close to giving up on Blogger.


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Thursday, March 30, 2006

Putting my short stories out there

I have posted The Winners,the first short story in Some Things Just Happen on my Snow In March . Please visit and take a peak.

If you like the story, follow the link back to Paul Gavin's Storefront. Or you can visit next week for the next story.

One surprising tidbit. Since I posted the first five chapters of Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain on my blog at Lulu, I have actaully been getting more traffic there than here at blogger.com. Makes me wish that Lulu had a better blogging tool. I really tried to use the tool, but it refused to bend to my will. Personally, I cannot accept that. I guess I'll keep posting the chapters here and try to keep interesting posts on Paul Gavin's Blog. So, if you don't get enough of me here, and who amongst you actually does, you can stop by and see what things are like at Lulu. Come on, you know you're want to, just click. It's easy. You can do it. There, didn't that make you feel better?


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Random placements of keywords

Last night I published what I felt was a fairly humorous attempt to prove my point that the guy I referenced was full of crap. It was, of course, a public service for you my readers. Consistent with my attempts to follow every route possible to build my traffic and report the result back to you, I had to give this a try.

Guess what happened. Ab-so-lute-ly nothing, zero, nada, zipski, big doughnut hole - I didn't get a single visitor from a search engine in the last twenty-two hours - none. Additionally, I did a few searches of my own. After searching through the first twenty pages of each of my searches and not seeing any reference to my posting, I decided to give up. My posting is not even a blip.

The good news is that if you type rebeleyeball in just about any search engine, you get inundated with my posts. Blook will get you mine, Story Blook and a few others.

A search on Paul Gavin will get you some, but that pesky English photographer keeps his ironfisted grip on the top spot - just because he has a well-presented, well-established commericial web site - well, la-de-da. Then there's the cowboy and the painter - who are all these dudes using my name? Take some pictures, ride a few bulls, paint pictures for a few decades and they think the own my name. Give up your spot, boys. Let a fellow Paul Gavin get some search engine placement, wouldya?


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Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Posted Chapter 29

Chapter 29 is now ready for your reading pleasure. Hope you're enjoying were the boys in the band are heading. I wonder what's going to happen next.

Off and on I have whined about not getting the traffic I would like to. I have still been doing research to see if I can find anything that might helps. I ran across something very funny, but I left the page before I copied the text. Frankly, I am too damn lazy to look through my browser history to find it. First, it wasn't really that well written. Second, I am so much better at paraphrasing.

Here's the claim. This guy said that he "accidently" posted something with the words Anna Kournikova and penthouse and he got over 40,000 hits on his web site in one day. Are you through laughing? Okay, can I continue? Shall we test the theory?

How's this? Brittany loves to eat asparagus spears, but she has a very unusual technique. Usually, she sucks the tips before taking a big bite of the fat fleshy part.

Here's another - The naked truth is that Jessica loved watching Homer Simpson. She and her sister, Ashley just couldn't get enough of the his goofy antics. They had two TVs in their Penthouse appartment so they wouldn't get sweaty, wrestling over the remote control.

Now it's time to sit back and watch the traffic. Do you think I should notify Blogger that I am expecting a significant jump in traffic to my sight. They may have to add some server capacity to keep up with all the new visitors - could get ugly.


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Tuesday, March 28, 2006

The Break - Chapter 29

Chapter 29

Immediately after the bus parked on the ferry, Ronnie disembarked. It was as if the school bell had rung. Full of excitement, Ronnie mounted the stairs to the passenger deck. Not even slowing down, he crossed the length of the ship to the outside observation deck. Ronnie just wanted to watch the water.

“Where’d Ronnie go?” Pete asked.

“No clue.” Ass responded. “All I know is he was outta here like his hair was on fire.”

“Hair on fire?” Pete retorted. “Where did you hear that one? From your Granny?”

“Shaddup, bitch.” Ass responded playfully.

Pete turned to look at Chelsea. Seeing her smile, he felt a twinge in his groin. He had never been so attracted to a woman before. It wasn’t just a physical attraction. When he saw her in the crowd in Seattle, he couldn’t believe how happy his was. As much as he hated to admit it, one of the main reasons he played so well last night was because of her.

He wanted to play for her because he knew how horny it made her. When Pete finally turned his attention to Chelsea the night the three of them had hooked up in the hotel in Spokane, he slid his hand into her pants. She was the wettest he had ever felt and he had felt plenty.

“Whoa, you are so wet.” Pete said to her.

“You did that to me.” She replied. “The way your fingers move. Now let’s see what you can do with those fingers down there.”

“What do want?” Pete teased.

“Play with me.” Chelsea pled as she ground her pelvis on Pete’s hand.

“Play with what?” Pete asks as he slid her pants down past her bottom and on to the floor.

“Play with my pussy.” Chelsea continued. “Please Pete, play with it.”

Pete obliged her. First, he rubbed her on the out side with his whole hand with firm pressure. Then he backed off on the pressure and began to lightly stroke her clitoris. Suddenly, he felt his pants being unbuckled. Initially he was shocked, and then he remembered Emily. Feeling the warm of her mouth as her lips wrap around him, drove Pete past the point where he could continue teasing Chelsea. He slid his index finger deep inside her. Her moans of approval drove his desire to please her even more. Knowing exactly what to do, he bent her g-spot like the g-string on his guitar.

Her moans quickly escalated to shrieks as her climax lubricated her even more. Not realizing how brusquely he extracted himself from Emily’s mouth, he stepped into Chelsea and in one swift motion he was deep inside her.

“Yo, Pete.” Ass shouted. “You coming or what?”

“Almost.” He quipped with a little smile. “Uh…I was lost in thought.”

“Must’ve been a good thought.” Chelsea said as she walked past and slid her hand over the lump in his pants.

The look in her eyes almost melted Pete’s brain. This woman had him. It was a strange feeling for Pete. In the past, he had never cared for much more than the score. Now, things were different. It both excited him and scared him more than anything he had ever experienced. Not even caring how it would end, he was definitely going to enjoy the ride.

Up on the observation deck, the tribe gathered together. Well, almost together. Standing on the rail, Schnieder silently stared at the water. Ronnie and Big Ron were engaged in a deep conversation. Ass paid particular attention to Emily as Ben sulked close to the door. Pete and Chelsea were making out, oblivious to everything else.

“Get a room.” Ass repeated the hackneyed phase.

Breaking apart somewhat embarrassed, Pete wiped his mouth. Although they stopped kissing, they remained tightly entwined. Pete was completely lost in the feeling as Chelsea absent-mindedly stroked his chest.

“Ever made love on a boat, Pete?” Chelsea asked with a sly smile.

“No, you?” He replied.

“Not on one like this.” She said coyly. “Let’s go do it.”

“Where?” Pete asked. “The bus?”

“Sounds good to me.” She said as she broke free and headed back into the enclosed portion of the ferry.

Seemingly entranced by the boat wake, Schnieder did not notice that Pate and Chelsea had flitted away. Far from being mental vacant, Schnieder’ brain was working overtime. He was creating a mental checklist for the work he needed to perform. In the current state, the boxes would not pass even a cursory inspection at the border. It was imperative that he do something more to camouflage them. There was some urgency here. They would arrive in Vancouver in just a little over three hours.

Feeling he had a complete checklist, Schnieder was ready to execute. Relying on his training, he managed to move past the remaining five individuals without a single one noticing. Failing to notice that he had not accounted for all the members of the party, he made his way to the bus.

Upon arriving at the bus, Pete started to kiss Chelsea. But she pulled away.

“I have an idea.” Chelsea said looking down avoiding eye contact.

Since she first saw Pete three days ago, her life had been turned upside down. Although she had been to many concerts, she had never gotten so excited by someone in the band. In fact, she had an orgasm while dancing. Not only was that a first, but she had never been invited back stage before. Then she had sex with her best friend Emily. Now, she was initiating sex with this boy and she was about to ask him to help her live out one of her fantasies. Yes, this had been an amazing three days.

“Instead of having foreplay, let’s just do it.” She started.

“Sounds good to me.” Pete agreed.

“But, I want you to slide it in as slow as you can.” She continued her desire emboldening her more. “Then when you get it all the way in, just keep it there.”

“You don’t want me to move at all?” Pete asked somewhat confused.

“Yeah, just throb inside me and I’ll squeeze you.” She explained. “We can kiss and you can play with these.”

“So, let me get this right.” Pete said in a slightly sarcastic tone. “I get to fuck you, kiss you and play with your titties, but you don’t want me to really do a lot of work. Gotta tell ya, I don’t see a down side.”

Chelsea smiled and pushed him on the bed. Joining him there, she laid next to him and spread her legs. Pete got into position and began to slowly press forward.

“Ahhhhhh.” He moaned as he pushed into her.

“Shhhhhhhhh.” Chelsea said. “No noise … from either one of us.”

“You’re kinda kinky, girlie.” Pete chided.

“Shhhhhhhh.” She responded.

They followed her plan precisely. Pete had not thought it would be anything special, but he couldn’t have been any more wrong. The slowness forced an intimacy that he never would have experienced by banging away. Chelsea’s squeezing keep him fully aroused, but silent stillness gave him a chance to gaze into her eyes, slowly stroke her beautiful face as she gently traced her fingernails on his back. Gentle kisses from both of them enhanced their enjoyment. They had held their position for almost fifteen minutes when they heard the thump.

Jolted, but still locked tightly. They pair gave each other a look, but then decided to shrug it off. But then there was more noise and it was from directly below them. The shuffling was incessant. After two or three minutes, Pete pulled back the curtain and saw Schnieder moving equipment and some boxes around. He didn’t recall seeing them before.

“It’s just Schnieder.” Pete said to Chelsea. “Moving stuff in the cargo hold.”

“He’s right below us?” She asked.

“Yeah.” Pete said in a dismissive tone.

“Ohhhh.” She said. “That’s kinda hot. Do it right above somebody.”

“Yeah.” Pete agreed, but right now he would have agreed that having sex inside a lava lamp was kinda hot.

Returning to their silent ecstasy, they soon forgot about Schnieder. The session turned out to be a marathon that neither had ever experienced. She got there first. The damp spasm of her internal walls was too much for Pete. The explosion that wracked his body felt as if ropes were shooting out of him. He continued shooting and shaking for what seemed to be an entity. Falling off her, he laid next to her and stared deeply into her eyes. Neither one moved or made a sound. They just lay there enjoying the moment. At that point in time, they both knew this thing they started was big, really big.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Harrisons were glad to be sharing each other’s company. Big Ron had never confided in his son in the past. But the conversation they were having now, on the observation deck of a ferry crossing Puget Sound on a beautiful spring day led him to believe he could.

“Dad, it is totally cool.” Ronnie said excitedly. “It’s like every night we get better.”

“Every night, huh?” Ron responded a bit skeptically.

“Seriously, Dad.” Ronnie responded sincerely. “The guys have been so tight. And it’s like I go into this trance almost. It’s like I don’t even think about play or singing, it’s just happening and … it’s…like…damn…you know.”

“I think so.” Ron responded genuinely. “Sounds like when I was playing ball. I almost felt like I was watch the game on TV and I could see the play unfolding before anyone else.”

Ronnie snapped up from his position leaning over the rail of the ferry. Looking directly into his eyes, he saw the look. It was the exact same look he saw in Ben, Ass, and Pete’s eyes when they were talking about the last show. It was astounding, his Dad did get it. That meant his Dad got him. Almost overwhelmed, Ronnie was speechless.

“Uh…Ronnie…” Big Ron started deciding to take advantage of the situation. “I have something I want to talk to you about.”

“Is it about you and Shelia?” Ronnie asked expecting that they eventually get to this conversation.

“Not exactly.” Big Ron said as he shook his head from side to side. “Man, I didn’t think this would be this hard.”

“What’s up, Dad.” Ronnie asked his voice betraying his concern.

How exactly do you go about telling you child you have cancer? Parents spend their entire life trying to protect their child from harm, to shield them from pain. Any pain, whether it is physical or mental. Regardless of how he may have been with Ronnie, he was his son and he loved him more than he loved his own life. Maybe that’s why he had ridden him so hard when he was younger. Because Ronnie didn’t share his dream, he had thought his son was not reciprocating his love.

“Dad?” Ronnie asked. “You’re kinda freaking me out.”

“Sorry, Ronnie.” Big Ron said apologetically. “It’s just that, well, I have…uh…I have prostate cancer.”

“What?” Ronnie asked completely stunned.

“I have prostate cancer, but it’s okay.” Big Ron said trying to soften the blow.

“What do you mean, it’s okay?” Ronnie asked indignantly.

Big Ron mused a little at the response. He had worried about telling his son that he was sick and the minute he told him, Big Ron became a father again. His mission was to ease his son’s pain. It was liberating to know that even when he was feeling his own morality, his son still came first. It was the natural order of things.

“It’s fine because I have already completed my first round of chemo.” Big Ron stated matter-of-factly. “We won’t know if I am in remission for a couple months.”

“Is that good?” Ronnie asked.

“Not sure.” Big Ron replied. “Like I said, the chemo has killed everything including a fair portion of my healthy cells.”

“Are you okay?” Ronnie asked.

“I’m doing okay.” Big Ron replied. “Just get tired really quickly.”

Thinking back, it suddenly made sense to Ronnie. The haggard look on his Dad’s face when he first got on the bus was a byproduct of his chemo. Seeing the look on Big Ron’s face, Ronnie knew it was time to change the subject.

“Hey Dad, ready for this?” Ronnie asked somewhat amused.

“Sure, what’s so funny?” Big Ron asked.

“Not funny, really.” Ronnie responded. “It just that Ben and Eddie kinda hooked up.”

“What?” Big Ron replied stunned. “Hooked up?”

“Yeah.” Ronnie said. “You know that Ben’s gay right?”

“I thought so, but it really wasn’t any of my business.” Big Ron admitted. “But Eddie?”

Questioning the wisdom of telling his Dad about his band mates. Ronnie paused to consider whether or not he should change to subject. Before he had a chance, Big Ron continued.

“Hey, I don’t care, buddy. Really.” Big Ron said sincerely. “Just always thought Eddie was straight. And that set of tits he’s hanging out with makes it seem like he still is.”

Ronnie recoiled from the statement. He really hated when Big Ron talked about woman like that. As a matter of fact, he didn’t care for it much when Pete did it either. A strange thought occurred to him. When it came to woman, Pete and his Dad were very similar. He decided to let it pass.

“Yeah, that’s his denial reaction.” Ronnie said. “He was pretty freaked out afterward and he kinda jumped at Emily. It’s like his trying to rub the gay off him.”

“Well, I wouldn’t mind rubbing on her myself.” Big Ron said.

“Geez, Dad.” Ronnie said.

“I know.” Big Ron agreed. “Old dogs still like to hunt.”

They both turned and looked out across the water. The cool spring air bit their cheeks, but it felt good. Both men enjoyed being out on the water. Just then off the starboard bow, a killer whale surfaced and blew a plume of air and water out of its blow hole. It was so close. They could see the hole close up as it dove back down under the surface. It was found by a second and then a third. They heard footsteps. But this was to interesting to turn away, so they ignored the interlopers. The three killer whales kept pace with the ferry for several minutes. Then as suddenly as they appeared they vanished.

For the first time, Ronnie pulled his eyes from the water and turned to see the observation deck crowded almost to capacity. It seemed they weren’t the only two mesmerized by the water acrobatics of the orcas.

“That was too cool.” Ronnie said to Big Ron.

“I have to agree.” Big Ron replied. “Those are some awesome animals.”

“Did you see the blow holes opening and closing?” Ronnie continued excitedly. “I never thought it was like that.”

There is something about seeing whales in the wild that cannot be expressed with words. For some reason, they had no desire to continue talking about what they just witnessed. Instead, they stood and looked at the water for a long time.

“So, what about you?” Big Ron asked after the silence became noticeable.

“What about me?” Ronnie asked confused.

“Well, Pete has …uh…Chelsea .. is it? Eddie has his hands fully … literally.” Ron chuckled at his own joke. “With Emily and Ben. What about you?”

“Her name’s Annie.” Ronnie replied picking up on what his Dad was asking. “She’s in Colorado. I wanted to have her come up for a couple shows, but…”

“But what?” Big Ron asked.

“Well, we’re working and making good cash, but we haven’t gotten paid yet.” Ronnie explained.

“Why don’t you ask me?” Big Ron prompted.

Ronnie paused. His father had given them so much. In fact, he was really responsible for them getting their break. Also, he was responsible for the quality of their sound system. After all, his money paid for all of it. Ronnie was reluctant to ask him for more.

“Cause you’ve already given me …us so much.” Ronnie said.

“Hell, I’m not giving you shit, you rich bastard.” Big Ron said good-naturedly. “But I will give you a loan. Get her up here, boy.”






<<< Chapter 28

Chapter 30 >>>


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Sunday, March 26, 2006

Updates on my books

When I tried to publish the chapters of Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain, I found the blogging tool on Lulu is extremely limited and very frustrating to use. Therefore, I created another blog Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain where I have published the first 25 chapters of Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain. Get started reading PROUT - Chapter 1.

Additionally, I posted The Break - Chapter 28. The stories are starting to merge. I hope you like how I am doing it. As always, I welcome all feedback.


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The Break - Chapter 28

Chapter 28

The storm was gone as suddenly as it appeared. It left a-half-an-inch of pebble-sized hail on Anita’s balcony. The fury of the storm matched the mood in Ron’s head. He had run through a few of the general issues with Anita, but it was time to get down to the details of exactly what happened that night.

But how do you tell the story in a logical fashion when it just didn’t make sense. Sure, he had seen Schnieder’s erratic behavior and the interactions between him and the mysterious Ian Gegger. But nothing else seemed to fit.

“Let’s give this another shot.” Ron said to Anita. “I think if I start with when I hooked up with the band and I give you some details we can make some head way.”

“Okay.” Anita replied as she felt a pang in her stomach. “But is it okay if we order some food?”

“Don’t be silly, Nitti.” Elena said motherly. “I have burritos ready for heating or a big pan of enchilada’s that I can thaw and have ready in no time.”

Taking a moment, it occurred to Ron that he hadn’t had decent enchiladas in a very long time.

“Enchiladas sound great.” Ron said eagerly.

“But I thought you wanted to hear the story.” Anita protested not really wanting hear her sister banging around in the kitchen.

“The kitchen is right there and all I have to do is microwave the pan for twenty minutes and then put it in the oven.” Elena explained. “I was planning on having them for dinner anyway. So, everything is done.”

“If you really think you won’t miss much.” Anita acquiesced.

This brought peels of laughter from Elena. Apparently, she found something Anita said extremely funny. Anita felt a twinge of embarrassment for her sister. Ron wasn’t laughing and could not imagine that anything she said was even remotely humorous.

“Miss much.” She chuckled when she was able to speak. “With his voice? BOOM! BOOM! People in the street can hear the story.”

Instantly, Anita was more than embarrassed by her sister, she was mortified at her inappropriate comments. But it didn’t last long, because Ron let out a guffaw, followed by several moments of heartfelt laughing.

“She’s right.” Ron agreed. “I’ve never been accused of speaking too softly.”

As she turned toward the kitchen, Elena smiled to herself. In the last four or five hours, as she got to know him, Elena found that she liked this big gringo. He definitely had something about him.


“Enchilada’s it is.” Elena declared cheerily.

Not even hesitating, Ron began to tell the story from when he went to meet the band.

When Ron’s plane landed at SeaTac airport, the band’s bus was there to meet him. The band, actually, Ronnie, decided to take a ferry from Vancouver to Seattle. Being a native Coloradoan, large bodies of water were absolutely fascinating to Ronnie.

The number of their little tribe had grown. Emily arranged to leave her car at a friend from school’s house and she and Chelsea were going to ride with the band until they drove back through Seattle on the way to Portland. Now, Big Ron was with them. They were now eight.

From the moment he stepped on the bus, he felt tension. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but there was something.

“Dad, you remember Schnieder?”

The two men shook hands firmly and gave each other a speechless nod.

“You know the boys.” Ronnie said as they turned away from Schnieder.

“Hey, Mr. Harrision.” Ass said cheerfully. Leaning his head toward the person sitting in his lap, he continued. “This is Emily.”

“Hi there, Emily.” Ron said.

As he greeted her, he leaned forward just enough to make her lean towards him enough that he could get an excellent view of her very large breasts. He was rewarded with a very good view directly down her blouse.

“Hey Coach.” Pete said even though he hadn’t been on Ron’s team for almost ten years.

“Pete.” He said crisply as he nodded. “Who’s this?”

“Ah, sorry Coach.” Pete said apologetically. “This is Chelsea.”

“Hi Chelsea, nice to meet you.” He said.

Operating at a professional level in this regard, he did not try the same move he used on Emily. If you vary your technique, you rarely ever get caught. Instead, he waited until she began to sit back. It is a natural reaction for people to look away during the awkwardness of being introduced. At that moment, Big Ron took a quick inventory of Chelsea’s assets. He was very impressed.

“Very nice.” He thought. “Bet she looks even better naked. Ah, but don’t they all.”

Turning away, he saw Ben sulking and looking out the window. Quickly, he shot a look back at Ass and he knew. He didn’t know exactly what the problem was, but he knew it involved those two.

“Hi Ben.” He said in a very gentle tone. “You okay?”

“Huh?” Ben responded somewhat dazed.

He was some engrossed in thought, that he had no idea that Big Ron had boarded the bus.

“Oh, hey Mr. Harrison.” He managed. “It’s all good.”

Ron knew that was about the most he was going to get out of Ben. Turning back to Ronnie, he saw his son in a completely different light. In the month or so since he saw him, the boy had become a man. Unable to keep from smiling, he felt surge of pride build up inside him.

“Where we headed?” Big Ron asked.

“Well, we don’t play until tomorrow night.” Ronnie explained. “But I thought we’d catch the ferry today and kick around Vancouver. I heard it’s a pretty cool city. And freaking Pete has never been to Canada. Can you believe that?”

“Well, yeah. I guess I believe it.” Big Ron replied.

They continued talking as Schnieder guided the bus up the I-5 towards the ferry docks. A small spasm shot down Schnieder’s spine.

“What time is the ferry?” Schnieder asked.

“We have like two hours.” Ronnie said. “I think we have to get in line like an hour before hand to make sure we get on it.”

“Uh…I just remembered.” Schnieder said uneasily. “I have to pick up some stuff for the lighting. But it’s really close to the dock. Is that okay.”

“Yeah, cool.” Ronnie replied.

The conversation seemed innocent enough, but it didn’t sit right with Big Ron. There was something in the way that Schnieder worded the question. Ron wrote it off as post air travel mental slow down. It wasn’t really jet lag, because it is only a one hour difference between Mountain Time and Pacific Time. But Ron believed there was definitely a diminished mental capacity that people suffered when they flew. No one else believed him, but he had landed several large deals in his favor by flying the other side in at the last minute. Additionally, he would never fly in the day of a meeting. Want to have every advantage possible, he always flew in the day before the meeting and made sure he got a full night’s sleep.

Since he thought it was just him, Ron wanted to sit down. Actually in his current state, he wanted to lie down. The two hour flight had almost completely sapped his energy. It didn’t take much since he started the chemo.

Taking the time to look at his father closely, Ronnie saw how exhausted he looked. It took him completely by surprise. His dad had always been the picture of health. A strong, mountain of a man that never backed down from a physical challenge in his life, he had always been Big Ron. But he couldn’t really deal with his feelings right now. There was too much happening.

“Dad?” He said as soon as the thought crossed his mind. “We have beds in the back ….”

Ronnie saw it briefly in Big Ron’s eyes. It wasn’t any more than a flash, but it was there. It was the look of embarrassment that some one who wasn’t well, but was doing his best to hide it. Ronnie thought quickly, he knew his father was uncomfortable that Ronnie had seen his weakness and acted on it. Wanting to give him an alternative, it came to him.

“There’s a shower, too.” Ronnie said. “You know, whatever you need to freshen up after the trip.”

“Sounds good.” Ron said. “Think I’ll go back and give it a look.”

Opening the divider, Big Ron walked to the back of the bus and collapsed onto the bed. He was even more exhausted than he had thought. Sinking deeply into the surprising comfortable, Big Ron was sure he would fall asleep immediately. However, sleep didn’t come. Instead, he laid there and thought about Ronnie’s situation.

It seemed that Ronnie was handling it all right. Big Ron had never seen his son walk with such an air of confidence. It was startling, but very satisfying. For the first time, he really saw himself in his son and he was very, very proud.

The bus came to a stop. It seemed that it was stopped longer than any stoplight. Curious, Big Ron sat up and looked out the window. Remembering that Schnieder wanted to make a stop, he wasn’t surprised to see him walking into the warehouse. For some reason, Big Ron decided to watch for a while. What he saw next, didn’t seem right. Schnieder appeared with a medium size moving box. By the way he was straining, it appeared to be a very heavy box. Not knowing much about lighting he could be sure, but it seemed the box was much heavier than he would have guessed.

“What are you looking for?” He asked himself.

Soon Big Ron rolled over and fell into a deep sleep.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

The warehouse was devoid of human presence except for Ian. Patiently, he waited for Frankie to show up. Checking his watch, he noted that Frankie had exactly three minutes and thirty second to show up. Exactly, three minutes later he saw the bus pull up at the cross street. Even if the light was red, Frankie was going to be on time. Ian was pleased, Frankie had maintained his training.

The other four had all lost their training. None of them recognized him or the code words, but they all did a double take when he mentioned “Operation Active”. Not out of recognition, but because a complete stranger walked up to them and said “Operation Active”.

Ian found himself hustling out of an alley after the first time, very disappointed in himself in not doing better research. He was much more careful on the subsequent encounters. Having no luck, he had almost given up on approaching Frankie. But his desire to complete this mission overcame any trepidation he had about embarrassing himself one more time.

Therefore, right now he felt that the mission had a better than even chance of succeeding. It was the first time he had thought that since he came up with this desperate plan over fifteen years ago in the wasteland of Northern Afghanistan.

As Schnieder got off the bus, Ian saw he pick up the gait of a soldier. His shoulders pulled back, chest out, chin up and completely confident he strode quickly to the door that Ian told him to come to.

“Afternoon, sir.” Schnieder snapped crisply as he came to attention in front of his superior.

“Afternoon, soldier.” Ian responded. “You’re late.”

“Respectfully, sir.” Schnieder responded. “I am exactly eleven seconds early.”

“So you are, soldier. So, you are.” Ian agreed good-naturedly.

Quickly, he performed his inspection of his troop. Once again, Ian was impressed. To the causal observer, everything about Schnieder indicated that he was a burned out ex-hippie. But Ian could see the attention to detail. The subtle crispness of all of his clothing. Reaching in to Schiender jacket, Ian extracted his Glock and inspected it closely. Sliding the action back, he caught the ejected cartridge before it hit the ground. Ian was more than pleased, this man was ready for anything. The action of the weapon was completely smooth and then was not a speck of dust to be seen. Ian knew this weapon had been cleaned this morning.

Not satisfied by one weapon, he reached into his waist band and extracted his second weapon. Same inspection, same result. Lastly, he checked his backup in his boot. That, too, was in impeccable condition.

“Excellent, Johnson.” Ian praised. “You are the best damn soldier in the outfit.”

“Thank you, sir.” Schnieder responded.

“Now here is the task I have for you.” Ian started. “I have material stored in several places where your little tour is going to take you. You assignment is to locate the provisions and keep them close to you.”

“Yes, sir.” Schnieder responded. “No problem, sir.”

“Remember, this is a dark operation.” Ian lectured. “That means no one, repeat, no one is to know anything about this. Including any local law enforcement or federal agency and especially no civilians. Understood?”

“Yes, sir.” Schnieder responded.

Ian looked hard at his soldier to be sure that message was received.

“This means that you have the authority and the duty to ensure the security of the mission.” Ian cautioned. “By use of any means you deem necessary.”

“Understood, sir.” Schnieder replied.

“Now, here are the first three packages.” Ian barked. “You are not authorized to look at the contents. Keep them sealed and secured and with you until you receive further instructions. Clear?”

“Crystal, sir.” Schnieder responded.

“Now pack ‘em up and get the hell out of here before your civilians get worried and come looking for you.” Ian said dismissively.

“Yes, sir.” Schnieder responded.

As bent over to pick up the first box, he looked up to see if Ian was watching him. But he was no where to be found. It was as if he disappeared or had never been there. Schnieder wasn’t really sure, but he didn’t trust his judgment in matters like this. All he knew was that he had his orders and he would follow them. Unfortunately, he knew what would happen if he didn’t follow orders. That was never going to happen to him again – ever. Shivering at the thought, he quickly straightened up, turned and carried the first box to the bus and stored in behind the band’s equipment. Completing the other two trips quickly, he made some adjustments that would ensure that they would not draw attention.

It was important that Ian maintain an almost ghost like presence around Frankie. Keeping the weapon guessing was part of the process. There were to reasons for this. First, it was a very effective way of controlling the weapon. Second, it provides plausible deniability in case the weapon is captured or in case of a glitch.

It happened during the first round of the experiment when they allowed an uncertified weapon back into the United States. Without the proper handling, the weapon snapped under the duress and climbed a clock tower. The result was twelve dead civilians. Even worse, it compromised the mission he had been trained for. This mission could not fail.

The task that Ian assigned to Frankie was not just a logistical one. This was also a test. Ian could have waited to have him pick up the explosives when they returned to the United States, but he wanted to see if Frankie could make it through two border crossings without getting caught. If he could do that, the rest of the mission should go off without a hitch, since the bus wouldn’t be subjected to the same level of scrutiny at any other juncture.

Judging on how Frankie had performed so far Ian was fairly confident that he would make it back to Portland with all the explosives and the rest of the equipment he had stashed in Vancouver and Victoria.

Ian was smiling as he watched the bus pull out of the parking lot and drive toward the ferry dock. Once again, Ian found himself smiling. It was pure genius to take ferries to Canada. The security at the ferry terminals was much more relaxed than at the highway crossings. Yes, he had to give Frankie credit. The man was operationally sound, despite the fact that he had no idea what he was doing. Not on a competence level, he literal had no idea the actions he was taking. All of the facts of the mission were coded into him. When Ian talked to him, he was really speaking directly to Frankie’s subconscious and completely bypassing his normal language processing capabilities. The result is that Frankie acted, but he was not aware that he was doing anything.






<<< Chapter 27


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Friday, March 24, 2006

Making a run

It's time to get going. We're here to sell books and that's what I am going to try to do. The first thing I did was to change my adwords campaign. Instead of having the ads targeted to Misadventures of a 42-year old wannabe which I had been doing to drive traffic to this site, I changed the campaign to point at Paul Gavin's Storefront. This is my Lulu storefront where I sell Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain.

The next thing I did was go to My Blog on Lulu and post 5 chapters of the book. Additionally, I removed the full length preview from the site. Now, if you want to read Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain you need to read it on the blog or buy it. I am only going to keep 10 chapters at a time on the blog, so that people have to come back or give them an incentive to buy.

Then, I went out a registered my Lulu blog with several blog directories. I tried to use everything I learned when I started this blog. Hopefully, I can start driving more traffic to Paul Gavin's Storefront and that will result in selling a few books or a least get some people to leave reviews of the book.

Now I have a full court press going and I am hoping that it results in sales. If sales don't pick up then I will have to try a different strategy.


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Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain - Chapter 1

One of my completed works is called Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain. I had the whole book posted at Lulu as the preview. That didn't help me sell any books. Since many people have been reading the serialized version of The Break, I have decided to serialize Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain.

Since it is a completed work, I will be able to post a chapter a day. Today I posted Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain - Chapter 1. I will probably post a few more chapters today to get the ball rolling. I have also posted a Table of Contents on Links to All Rebeleyeball Posts.

If you like what you read, you don't have to wait. You can just go to Progressing Rapidly Over Uneven Terrain and purchase a copy. Even if you don't purchase a copy, I invite you to use the rating tool on Lulu to let other's know what you think of the book.


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Thursday, March 23, 2006

And here's Chapter 27

I did something a little different in Chapter 27. Both segments are about the boys in the band. Not sure why, I just really wanted to write both these segments. I think they fit really well together.


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The Break - Chapter 27

Chapter 27

The gig they were play was on the campus of the University of Washington. So when the I-90 came to and end, Schnieder veered the bus right on to the I-5. It took thirty-five minutes to get to the U district. Finally, the bus rolled into the parking lot of the hotel.

“Jesus Christ, the traffic in this town sucks.” Schnieder exclaimed.

Ass appeared from the back of the bus for the first time since he went back to cry. Quickly, he walked through the bus and out the door without saying a word to anyone.

“Eddie?” Ben queried softly.

But Ass was already to the lobby door. Ronnie was right behind him and they approached the desk together.

“Hi, you have a reservation for Harrison?” Ronnie asked the man behind the desk.

“One moment, sir.” The man responded crisply. “Yes, four rooms.”

“Can we get five rooms instead?” Ass asked meekly.

Ronnie turned and stared at Ass for a moment. He shook his head and turned to the desk clerk.

“Yeah…uh…five rooms.” Ronnie repeated.

“Certainly, we have an extra room.” The front desk man said. “Just for tonight, correct?”

“Yes, just tonight.” Ronnie confirmed.

The rest of the group arrived at the desk.

“Just one key for each room?” The clerk asked.

“Yeah.” Ass replied.

“But Eddie …” Ben started.

“I got my own room.” Ass stated flatly.

They all stood in silence as the desk clerk created the magnetic keys. When he finished one, he put the key in its individual envelop and wrote the room number on it. Ass he placed it on the counter, Ass reached out, grabbed the key and walked to the stairwell. Even though the room was on the seventh floor, he didn’t want to wait for the elevator and risk having to ride up with Ben.

Running up the seven flights of stairs, Ass arrived before the elevator. Quickly, he made his way to his room, slid the card key into the lock and opened the door just as the bell for the elevator sounded. Ducking into his room, he closed the door, leaned back against it and sunk down to the floor.

They knew, they all knew that he and Ben had sex because he told them. This was not what he expected when this all started. At first, he had been shocked by Ben’s accusations. After he thought it through, he did feel as though he loved Ben. Actually, he knew he loved Ben, but the giddiness of the realization had evaporated when he realized that he really had sex with another man. Maybe it was no big deal to others, but he had never thought he was gay. He didn’t feel gay. Even when he was hugging Ben at the show, he had been looking at the large breasted woman.

How was he going to be able to face them? How could he possibly ever look Ben in the eyes again? This was not good, not good at all. He just needed a bit. Maybe after they got in the groove tonight, things would be different.

“Yeah, we just have to play together.” He thought. “Then everything will be cool.”

There was a sharp knock on the door that jolted Ass out of his daydream.

“Rehearsal in a half hour.” Ronnie said. “Be in the lobby in twenty minutes. We’re walking.”

“Cool.” Ass replied.

When they met in the lobby, Ass was the last to arrive. As soon as he walked up, the rest of the group joined him as he went straight for the door. He knew where they were going and he just kept walking.

“Eddie, are you going to talk to me?’ Ben asked.

“Not now.” Ass replied.

“But Eddie …” Ben pled.

“Not now, Ben.” Ass said emphatically. “Not now.”

They continued into the arena without another word. Pete and Ronnie felt too uncomfortable to speak. Ben was still trying to figure out what had transpired. One minute, he was basking in the warm afterglow of utterly satisfying sex. The next, he felt as if he had been used and discarded.

As the group approached the stage, they saw that Schnieder and the locals had made a great deal of progress on the stage. This was a huge step up for them. Instead of playing a medium size venue as the main band, they were the support band for a much more established act. That meant all of their equipment was set up in front of the equipment of the main attraction.

Unlike most new bands, Ratdick had very nice equipment. Mainly Because Big Ron had wanted to give his son the best possible chance at success. In fact their equipment was obviously better than the headliner’s.

“This is a trip, eh?” Ronnie said.

“No, shit.” Pete said as he looked up and slowly walked around in a tight circle.

“This place is fucking huge.” Ronnie exclaimed. “I wonder how the sound is.”

Pete hopped up on the stage, walked over to his guitar stands and picked up his white fender Stratocaster. Throwing the strap over his shoulder, he turned to his band mates.

“Let’s find out, boys.” He said excitedly. “Schnieder, we live?”

“Fuckin’ A.” Schnieder replied.

Pete’s fingers struck the strings once, then the adrenaline kicked in and he ripped off a quick powerful riff.

“Let’s go.” He said again to his seemingly paralyzed brethren.

Ronnie joined him on stage, followed quickly by Ben. Ass stood in front of the stage as if he was caught in the suction of a very powerful pump. Not only was he unable to break away, he seemed to be getting sucked backward.

“Yo, bitch.” Pete shouted. “You in the game, Ass?”

The words stung him like a bucket of ice cold water. Quickly, he jumped on the stage and positioned himself behind his drum set.

As he tuned his Les Paul, Ronnie looked around and saw that everyone was set. Methodically, Pete strummed and the twisted the tuner slightly. Ben was doing runs on his base and ass was rap-tap-tapping on his snare.

“Slowly Descending into Darkness.” Ronnie stated authoritatively. “One, two, three.”

The sound simply exploded from two members of the quartet. Ronnie chose this song because it was slow and heavy. The plodding music was the right combination to settle them down and to tune with long notes. It wasn’t right. They were off. Looking at Pete, he saw his partner in the front was definitely in the groove. As though they were thinking with the same brain, he turned to look at Ronnie. Together, they turned around. It looked as if Ben was going to be sick and Ass just looked pissed.

Both guitarists stopped almost simultaneously. Realizing that they were off and they just weren’t going to get there.

“Whoa.” Ronnie said. “Again. One, two, three.”

Once again, the two guitarists began in perfect synchronization. This time both of them were facing the rhythm section so they could see what was happening. It only took fifteen seconds. Pete and Ronnie stopped again.

“Come on.” Ronnie said.

“It’s him.” Ass mumbled.

“What?” Ben asked indignantly.

“Who cares?” Ronnie asked. “Again. One, two, three.”

They kicked it off again. The result was pretty much the same. Not ever experiencing this before, Ronnie wasn’t quite sure what to do. Looking at Pete, they both thought they would just keep playing it. Maybe, they could play through this. Playing the entire song, they were not happy with how it sounded.

“Let’s go up tempo.” Ronnie said trying to get this rehearsal kicked started. “Ripped from My Lips. One, two.”

They hit the punky beat and it seemed a little better. Midway through the song it completely fell apart.

“What’s with you two?” Ronnie queried the rhythm section.

“He’s fuckin’ up.” Ass accused as he nodded his head toward Ben.

“No, I’m not.” Ben said defensively.

“Bullshit, you can’t keep up.” Ass continued his indictment. “You’re off a beat.”

“Bullshit, you’re varying the beat.” Ben said angrily.

Normally, Ben might try to adjust to anomaly in the rhythm. Then againg, it would usually only happen for a few bars. But he could tell, Ass was doing this on purpose. He wasn’t sure why Ass was being such a jerk today, but he wasn’t going to let anyone – not even Eddie – tell him his rhythm was off. It simply meant too much to him.

“Come on …” Pete started.

“Get you shit together, Ben.” Ass hissed.

“What is your problem?” Ben asked.

“You’re my problem.” Ass replied viciously.

“Why?” Ben asked. “Because I let you fuck me?”

“Let me?” Ass screamed as he stood up squeezing his sticks so tightly his fingers were turning white. “You fucked me up with all that “You love me and you know it” shit. All you wanted was dick.”

“What?” Ben said completely taken off guard by the assault.

“That’s right, you fuckin homo.” Ass said almost coming completely unglued. “You tricked me.”

It wasn't the first time Ben had been called a homo or a fag, but this time it cut much deeper. Wanting to give Ass the benefit of the doubt, he didn’t respond. Not that he had time.

“Look.” Ronnie said sternly. “I don’t care who fucked who or who tricked who or what-the-fuck-ever happened. It happened and you two gotta deal with it. But not here and not now – GOT IT. We are professionals. We are getting paid ten thousand dollars each tonight and we are going to earn it. Because I am not going to be a one shot and out guy. Ratdick is here for the long-term. OKAY?

They other three members of the band stood looking at Ronnie in disbelief. They all had noticed the change in him over the last few days, but none of them expected this type of leadership from him. He told them what they were going to do and they were sure they were going to do it.

“Let’s play Debbie and get past this - now.” He instructed. “One, two, three, four.”

Out it came and it was tight. Ass and Ben were finally in synch. Pete sounded good. Now Ronnie could catch the groove and enjoy.

“Much better.” He said as the song came to an end. “That’s it.”

Knowing they had to address this now, Ronnie was determined to talk to the rest of the band. But he knew they needed to get mentally prepared, so he did want to open the entire can of worms.

“Look, I understand you guys are going through some shit, okay.” Ronnie said gently. “But it’s like, we have this show and you need to be on. We’ll work through this together tomorrow. Please, just go to your rooms, order some room service and hang out until the show. Use the emotion in the music, all right?”

“Sure, dude.” Ass said apologetically.

“Cool.” Ben said.

“I’m going to check the sound with Schnieder.” Ronnie said as he jumped off the stage and walked over to the sound station.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The four of them were waiting in the wings. Nervously, Ass pounded his legs with his sticks. Ronnie rolled his neck and shook his arms. Ben cracked his knuckles. Strangely, Pete just leaned up against the leg and looked to see if he had a hangnail.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, Ratdick!” The announcer said.

They hustled into position. Without a sound, they launched into “Ripped from My Lips”. Instantly, Pete was into it. His fingers were ripping the sound from the strings and smashing it into the pickups which amplified the music causing sonic vibrations that drove the crowd into frenzy.

Just as he was about to fall over the edge into the dreamscape created by his talented manual digits, he saw them. There they were right in front of him, down and to the left. Both of them were completely filling his vision. It was Emily’s beautiful breast. Not surprisingly, they were attached to Emily. Standing right next to her was Chelsea. Overtaken by extreme joy, Pete fell in to the music head first and he didn’t come back for almost an hour. The only thing he felt was the waves of sonic bliss that continued to pour over him.

Ronnie was close to joining Pete. They were on fire tonight. Quickly, they were approaching the level they had played at in Spokane on the previous night. He had no idea that they could get up so high and exceed even their best previous performance, but they were. But he was worried about the boys. Finally, he couldn’t resist it any longer, the pull was too strong. He flew over the edge into the weightlessness of the wall of sound that they created.

Taking out all of his pent up frustrations, Ass pounded his drum kit. Even when he splintered stick after stick, he continued to beat them mercilessly. The driving rhythm began to sooth him. Feelingly the endorphin rush, he fell into compete synchronization with Ben. It was as if they had become one. They were absolutely perfect.

The only other time Ben felt as he did during this set was when Eddie had been deep inside him, stroking him to orgasm. The entire night he felt as if he was on the edge, In fact, he had an erection. Pulling his bass close, he slid up and down against it. It wasn’t the first time he had done this, but it was the first time it felt like real sex.

Sensing the energy emitted by the quartet, the crowd was going absolutely insane. The mosh was no-holds-barred intensity. Unlike in Spokane, Emily’s breasts weren’t the only ones protruding from the confines of material. In fact, there were at least four women with their tops around their waists. Dozens of anonymous hands stroking and grabbing at them didn’t seem to hamper the enthusiasm of the women. The sexually intensity was palatable. It drove the passion of the moment even higher. The crowd had grown into a organism greater than the sum of its parts.

One man made his way onstage completely unnoticed by anyone in the band. As he approached Ronnie, Schnieder appeared from no where. Initially, his thought was to take the guy out. But then he realized the context of the situation and he merely helped the man back into the audience with a gentle but firm push. Luckily, the crowd was waiting with outstretched arms and they surfed him to the back of the mosh pit.

Suddenly and without warning, it stopped both sound and light. Without the driving force, the crowd quickly became confused. The moshing fell into immediate disarray with just a touch of pushing and shoving. Restlessly, the crowd sought out something, anything in the darkness.

One spotlight flicked on illuminating Ronnie in front of the microphone. Slowly, he tuned his guitar as if he was searching for something. The crowd waited in eager anticipation. Falsely, they believed they were going to get a slight respite. The sudden explosion of sound and light almost knocked the collective crowd off their feet.

Within a moment, they recovered and began moshing with an intensified urgency. Sweaty bodies slammed into sweaty bodies. Hands landed on breast, bottoms, penises, some accidentally some quite purposely. Those from the outside slammed to the center. Those in the center attempted to burrow their way out only to slam themselves back into the center. Bedlam ruled and they loved it. They continued to mash themselves together into mass of flesh, sweat and clothing. The longer the song went, the greater the concentration of energy. By the time they finished, Ratdick was completely exhausted. The crowd was spent as well. But they managed to show their enthusiastic approval of the set.

As the band made their way off stage, they felt fantastic. It was a complete rush listening to the chaotic response. This was the reason all four of them were here. To get to this previously unattainable level of perfection driven by a group of young, crazy musically obsessed fanatics.

“Top of the world, dude.” Pete said out loud. “Hey, did ya see ‘em?”

“Who?” Ronnie asked.

“Emily and Chelsea are here.” Pete said excitedly. “I told them we were playing here. I guess they decided to drive over from Spokane. Gotta get ‘em back here.”

Instantly, Pete was gone looking for Schnieder to get Emily and Chelsea back stage. Turning around, Ronnie was confronted by a man he had never seen before standing uncomfortably close to him.

“What the fuck was that?” The man barked.

“Huh, what the fuck was what?” Ronnie replied.

“You had an hour and you played for almost 70 minutes.” The man continued.

“Who are you?” Ronnie asked confused.

“I’m Johnny Simms.” The man said as if the name should mean something to him.

Not recalling the name, Ronnie looked as if he stared hard enough the context would come to him. Instead, he replied in worst possible way.

“Who?” He asked.

“Johnny Simms, the leader singer in Storm Damage.” He said indignantly.

“Oh, yeah sorry.” Ronnie said sincerely. “I remember now. Really sorry, we just got in to in and ran a bit long. I’ll make sure we get our stuff off quickly so you can still go on time, okay?”

“That’s not the fucking point, asshole.” Johnny spat back. “You’re scheduled an hour, you play an hour. Got it.”

“Dude, chill.” Ronnie said looking directly into Johnny’s eyes with the Harrison stare.

“I’m talking to Randy.” Johnny said weakly. “You punk ass bitches aren’t getting away with this.

As he turned to walk away, Ronnie could help laughing. He was still laughing as he walked over to Ass and Ben.

“Did you get a load of that guy?” He asked.

“What was that about?” Ass responded.

“Not a clue, dude.”

Just then, Pete literally bounced back with Emily on one arm and Chelsea on the other. Leaning over, he kissed Chelsea on the lips. Emily showed her disappointment, but then smiled. She was having fun despite the fact that Pete was paying more attention to Chelsea.

The group stood on the wings and chatted around as the roadies cleared their equipment. They had heard of Storm Damage and they all wanted to hear them. Finally, the stage was set up. Standing twenty feet away from them was the other band minus Johnny.

“Jesus Christ.” One of them said. “Johnny doesn’t wanna come out, fuckin’ pussy.”

“I’m so over this shit.” Another one said.

After fifteen minutes, Johnny finally showed up. Although, the emotional heights the crowd had been at had declined significantly in the time it took Johnny to come out, they were still ready to continue.

“Here’s Storm Drain.” The announcer said.

They were greeted enthusiastically by the excited crowd. The music came up and it was Storm Damage’s current chart buster. The crowd responded by erupting into dance. The mosh pit kicked up and the party started. The second song was good, but it didn’t seem to have much heart. By the fifth song, Storm Damage lost all but the most hardcore and drunk in the audience.

“These guys are a little off tonight.” Ronnie said generously.

“Dude, they like suck.” Emily responded. “Let’s get out of here Pete.”

“Ronnie, wanna come, Dude?” Pete asked.

“Nah, I’m gonna go call Annie.” Ronnie responded.

Seeing an opportunity, Ass stepped up.

“Hey, I’ll hang with you guys.” Ass said.

“Really?” Pete said as he shot a glance at Ben and definitely saw the pain in his eyes.

“Yeah, sure.” Ass said.

Then he turned to Emily and gave her an obvious once over allowing his eyes to hover over her ample breasts. Then he looked back into her eyes and saw her cheery look.

“How you doing?” He asked shyly. “Emily, right?”

“Yeah, you’re the drummer.” Emily replied. “What’s your name?”

“They call me Ass.” He replied.

“That’s a funny name.” Emily giggled. “Why do they call you that?”

“Maybe I’ll let you know later.” He continued flirtatiously.

The group of four walked away leaving Ben and Ronnie standing in the wings.

“Ronnie, why is he doing this?” Ben asked.

“Ben, I have no idea.” Ronnie replied. “Maybe he’s just trying to adjust. It can’t be easy on him.”

“Maybe.” Ben said sadly. “But I don’t know how much I can take.”






<<< Chapter 26


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Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Yo! Check out Chapter 26

Can you believe that it's Chapter 26 already? Since I started this January 19, it has been just over two months. The story is over 56,000 words right now. Granted, I had already written about 25,000 of those words. Still, I think 31,000 words in eight weeks is a pretty respectable pace for someone that has a day job. Especially since, I have focused on writing the story over the past two weeks than wasting my time espousing my political views.

I expect the story to be between 150,000 and 200,000 words, so the story is between 25 and 35 percent complete. Overall, I am happy with the progress of The Break. But is it any good? Ah, that's the question. Personally, I really like it. But maybe I have a little bias. You know, even if I were the only one that likes it - so what. I'm having a great time.

Additionally, I have fixed my settings so anyone can leave comments (hint, hint).


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Tuesday, March 21, 2006

The Break - Chapter 26

Chapter 26

As he sat at the table on the deck, Ian watched the people walk on the 16th Street Mall. He always watched people. Actually, he was always evaluating each person to determine the level of threat they posed to him. It wasn’t a habit. It was a way of life. It had kept him alive for the last thirty years and he planned on keeping himself alive for another.

It was 1966 when he joined the Navy. Not wanting to be just another sailor, Ian applied for Navy Seal School. After he was accepted, he managed to make it through the training and was rewarded with his first tour in Vietnam early in 1967. He did his second tour right after and decided to stay for a third. That’s what caught the eye of the CIA station chief. Here was a highly trained killer that wanted to stay where the killing was. That could definitely become useful. The station chief immediately began recruit Ian. Ian’s stint in the Navy was up at the end of his third tour. He resigned and immediately joined the CIA. It wasn’t even necessary for him to leave Vietnam. The training began as soon as he walked off the base.

About five hundred yards from the gate, Ian heard the screech of tires. Before he could even react, three men jumped from the still moving car and grabbed Ian. They easily overpowered Ian and threw him into the back of a Mercedes Limousine. Totally disoriented, Ian looked up to see a very stern Station Chief staring at him sternly.

“I’m very disappointed.” The chief hissed. “Never, ever let your guard down. Lesson number one. Never let this happen to you again. If we were gooks or worse yet Russians, you would be headed for a very short life of torture and pain.”

Ian just lay on the floor. There was nothing to be said. He fucked up and he knew, but it would never happen again. That’s why even when sipping iced tea on a beautiful summer day in Denver, CO during peacetime, Ian accounted for every pedestrian, every car and every bus, everything period.

Being an experienced professional, Ian could be deep in thought while still monitoring his surroundings.

“Denver really is a beautiful place.” He thought. “A lot better than some of those Eastern European shit holes.”

During the last thirty odd years, he had rarely been in the US. One thing Ian knew for sure, he hated Eastern Europe. He much preferred South American or Asia, but this stint in Denver had really made him appreciate the US. He was here on a mission, a very important mission – personally.

Frank Johnson had just been the wrong grunt at the wrong time. It really wouldn’t have mattered who Ian grabbed that fateful day in Saigon in 1972, but Frank happened to be the one that staggered trustingly out of the bar that night. Ian had doctored his drink without Frankie having any idea of what was happening.

For the next two months Ian and his team of ‘specialists’ subjected Frank Johnson to unimaginable types of torture and ‘reprogramming’. They had turned him into a shell of a man. A man that wouldn’t fit in to society, but would serve a purpose at a later date.

That day had come. Ian had already made his first contacts with Frank. From those first meeting, Ian was sure that the ‘reprogramming’ had stuck. It was now just a matter of time. A few more chance meetings like those and Frankie Boy would be good to go.

Actually, Ian was quite surprised by Frank’s reaction to seeing him the first time. Especially since none of the other ‘trainees’ had even recognized Ian when he approached them to see if they were viable weapons. They had been totally useless, for some reason they had returned from Vietnam and got back to their lives. Obviously, Frank was different.

The theory was that one they had cracked the men, they would be able to create killing machines that could be used at later dates. Unfortunately, the operation was not sanctioned by any federal agency. As soon as the station chief’s superiors discovered the program, it was shut down with extreme prejudice. Luckily for Ian, the station chief bore the brunt of the wrath. He ended up spending the rest of his short life doing hard labor in Leavenworth.

Since he was technically just a field agent, Ian was reassigned for deep undercover operations. He was very skilled linguistically. It turned out that he had a natural ability with Slavic languages. After two years of intensive immersion training, he was inserted into Hungry.

Ostensibly, he was placed there to make contact with leaders of the 1956 rebellion. It was plausible since several had just been released after serving twenty years in jail. Given an identity and a list of contacts, Ian was dropped off on his own. He was given strict instructions to avoid making any contact with any of the individuals for the next three years. During that time, he was to assimilate to the culture and build his credibility. After the waiting period, he was to make sure he met his targets in a seemly random fashion. Once this was accomplished, he was to try to build an organization to formant a new uprising.

That is what they told him anyway. After being in country for three months, he was taken by the KGB and taken to Moscow. Upon arrival, he was treated with all the honors and ceremony that every captured spy receives. For years, he was subjected to torture, starvation and other deprivations.

It seems that the folks back in Washington weren’t as forgiving as they seemed to be once they found out how zealous Ian had been in “training” his men. All the time, effort and money they put into his training was actually an investment. They used him as a bargaining chip to free several Jewish dissidents from the gulag.

Being a guest of the KGB for almost twenty years was not kind to Ian. Being extremely intelligent and having plenty of time to think, Ian developed several scenarios as to how he ended up enjoying the hospitality of the Soviets. Most of the scenarios involved a conspiracy between his superiors. He had been set up and he knew it. There was no other explanation. Confident in his skills, he could imagine that he had made any mistakes. After spending so much time with the elite KGB, he knew they could not have been smart enough to break his cover on their own.

Suddenly, one night a man he had never seen came to the eight-by-eight cell he called home. Without explanation, the man picked him up from the floor and led him outside where he was loaded into a truck like a box of cargo. For four days he remained chained in the back of the truck. Then, the canvas flap was opened, his chains were removed and he was pulled from the truck. Unceremoniously, he was dumped on the ground like an unwanted cat and the truck drove away. No words were exchanged the entire time, so he had no idea where he was.

In didn’t matter. He was alive and he was free. Now, there was only one thought that occupied his mind. That thought was revenge.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

They stood there in disbelief. Ass had dropped a bomb and none of them really knew how to respond. This had been one bizarre bus trip. In the last three days, more stuff had happened than any of them could fathom. First, Ass declared that he and Ben were in love. Then they were almost too cute as a couple for a day and a half. Now, Ass just told them he and Ben had sex, but he couldn’t do it again.

“Dude.” Pete said. “What’s going on?”

“I … I … I …” Ass struggled to get the words out. “It’s … like … it’s just too weird.”

“What’s too weird?” Pete continued.

“Dude, I just had sex with another man … with Ben.” Ass tried to explain.

All of them paused to try to make sense of the situation.

“I’m so freaked out.” Ass cried as tears began running down his face. “I…I…can’t handle …”

“Sappenin', yo?” Ben asked a little too cheerfully. Being oblivious to Ass' emotional state, he was wallowing in his post-coital enthusiasm for all to see.

Realizing that Ben had joined them, everyone quit talking. The tension hung in the air as everyone waited for some one else to respond. No one did.

“Eddie?” Ben asked in a concerned tone when he saw the tears in Ass' eyes. His joyous state deflated instantaneously. “You okay?”

“No, dude.” He replied through his tears.

“What …” Ben started.

Ass pushed past Ben and went towards the back of the bus.

“I gotta be alone for a while.” Ass said after he passed.

Shutting the divider behind him, Ass threw himself on the bed where he and Ben had finished less than a half an hour ago. He cried softly at first and then he cried louder. But he covered his face with a pillow so the others would not hear him crying.

“What the hell?” Ben asked.

“Dude, no idea.” Pete responded.

“I think you two need to talk.” Ronnie added.

Schnieder just kept driving. That is one of the luxuries of being the driver. You have something else to occupy you when things get heavy. He busied himself looking in mirrors, adjusting the radio and washing the windshield.

Ben flopped down on the couch and gazed out the window. Ronnie opened his cell phone and started dialing a number. Picking up on the cue, Pete went to the closet and pulled out his acoustic guitar, sat down and began running through scales.

“Dad.” Ronnie said. “Yeah, it’s me. Hey, I have some great news. The record company set up some gigs for us.”

Moving to the front of the bus, Ronnie took a seat on the top step and put his feet down two steps lower.

“That’s great.” Ron said. “What did they offer you?”

“Twenty-five thousand per show.” Ronnie said happily.

“Wow, that’s a lot of money.” His father responded. “You didn’t take it, right?”

“Course not, Dad.” Ronnie replied. “You did teach me a few things.”

“So, how did you convince the guys not to take it?” Ron asked.

“No biggie, Eddie stepped up and told everyone I knew what I was doing.” Ronnie explained.

“Smart kid.” Ron said. “Always liked him. Pete give you any problems.”

“A little at first, but you know.” Ronnie said. “So, I countered with fifty and we got forty one five.”

“Not bad, son.” Ron said proudly. “Actually, it’s outstanding. Don’t think I could’ve done better myself.”

“Th-thanks, Dad.” Ronnie said taken aback at the compliment from his father.

“So where you playing?” Ron said.

They continued the conversation. Ronnie went through the itinerary and what they had been playing. Additionally, they talked about the reviews and how much larger the crowds had been getting. The word on Ratdick was out and people were coming in droves. Ron told Ronnie about the newest deal he was working on and then dropped a bombshell. It seemed that Ron and Sheila were having problems and they were going to officially take a break.

“So, you mind if your old man joins you on the road for a while?” Ron asked hesitantly.

“No, Dad.” Ronnie replied. “That’d be great – really.”

Never before had Ronnie felt so close to his father. This phone call was the best conversation they had ever had. Ronnie found himself actually missing his father. It was a new feeling. Ronnie felt a warm glow throughout his body. His Dad was coming to see him play. He really had made it.






<<< Chapter 25


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OH MAN!

I just received an email from one of my loyal minions that told me that I had comments set to team members only. Here I have been whining that no one has been leaving any comments and it's my fault - I apologize for my inability to check the settings on my very own blog. I have changed the settings to allow comments from anyone.

Oh well, please come back and visit - and please feel free to leave comments


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Monday, March 20, 2006

Chapter 25 and revisions

Although, I didn't make an announcement, I did complete and post Chapter 25 on Saturday. I hope you like the direction the story is heading.

Since you are reading a novel in progress, you get to see how I work. Over the course of writing the story, I have veered a bit off the course I intended at the beginning. To me, that is part of the fun. I think up new twists as I am writing. But in order to do some things, it requires that I go back and make changes to what I wrote earlier so that I can maintain consistency. Additionally, I wanted to add depth to a few of the characters.

The first thing I did was to take the chapter titled "The Break - Chapter 1 and Chapter 2" and renamed it "Chapter 1". The content is basically the same. I just replaced the "Chapter 2" with a dotted line. Now it is in the same format as the later chapters.

Then I renamed Chapter 3 to Chapter 2. It still starts with Ronnie setting traps for the furbies. I added a dotted line for the second half of the chapter. The second half introduces Sheila and Morgan, Big Ron's wife and daughter. I need these two for later in the story. They had been in the original version, but for some reason I skipped over them when I started this.

Chapter 3 is completely new. This is the section where I wanted to add depth. One to Ronnie's writing abilities and talent. Second, I wanted to give the basis to Big Ron's health issues.

In the future, I will be adding to the earlier chapters to build depth and consistency. I will let you know when I do.


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Saturday, March 18, 2006

The Break - Chapter 25

Chapter 25

While Ronnie was deciding whether or not to call his Dad, Pete was flipping through the channels on the satellite radio.

“How long we been on this bus?” Pete asked and without waiting for an answer he continued. “And I still don’t know the freaking stations. What’s the one with all the music?”

“Uh…all of them.” Ronnie responded.

Pete continued to flip through the stations and he stopped when he heard Trent Reznor’s voice.

“Here it is.” Pete said. Then he turned to Schnieder. “Don’t let Ben put it on the fucking jazz shit any more, all right?”

“It’s not Ben that does that.” Schnieder replied. “It’s me. Last time I checked, driver decides. Especially, when everyone is sleeping.”

“Dude, jazz?” Pete questioned.

“Fuck you. I’m old.” Schnieder retorted.

Pete laughed and slapped Schnieder on his back, turned and walked back to his couch.

“So, I never got a chance to tell you about Emily and Chelsea.” Pete said to Ronnie.

“Yeah, how’d that go?” Ronnie asked knowing that he had to indulge Pete on this.

“Ah, dude. It was so hot.” Pete said. “First time I ever had two women at the same time.”

“Uh, speak up a bit would ya?” Schnieder said. “I wanna hear about this.”

The comment struck Ronnie as incredibly funny. His laugh spread to Pete and then Schnieder found himself laughing, too. Actually, it was more like nervous giggling than laughter.

“So what happened?” Schnieder urged him on.

“Aw, dude. I thought you’d never ask.” Pete said as a broad smile spread across his face. “We went to the hotel and I held the door open for the girls and before I even got in the room, they were all over each other. Kissing and rubbing their titties on each other.”

“No fucking way.” Schnieder said.

“I can tell ya, it is not that farfetched.” Ronnie pitched in before Pete could say anything. “That …uh … Chelsea … she was playing with the other ones titties before they even left the arena.”

“No shit!” Schnieder exclaimed. “Where was I? I always miss the good shit.”

Ronnie thought about bringing up the scene in the alley, but then thought the better of it. It couldn’t help to bring that up now.

“Sucks to be you, Schnieder.” Pete said sarcastically. “So, we get naked and talk about smoking bodies. Emily was a little heavy, but you don’t see a rack like that on a skinny chick. But Chelsea, Christ dude.”

“Really?” Ronnie said some what surprised. “She looked okay, but I didn’t think she was all that.”

“Me neither.” Pete continued. “But I tell ya, when she took off her clothes, holy moly. She was perfect. Not an ounce of fat on her body, but she wasn’t skinny. And she was really muscular, but not buffed out like a dude. I tell ya, if I lived in Spokane, she’d be it.”

Ron stood up and walked toward the back.

“Keep talking.” Ronnie said. “I’m listening. Dudes want anything?”

“Beer me.” Pete said.

“I’ll have a water.” Schnieder added.

Opening the refrigerator door, Ronnie reached in and pulled out two bottles of water and a beer, Ronnie heard some familiar sounds coming from the back of the bus. Smiling, he walked forward to the others.

“Speaking of doing it, I think those guys are doing it right now.” Ronnie said as he handed the others their drinks.”

“No shit!” Pete said.

Then he felt a shiver go down his spine as he thought about what they were doing.

“Think you could do a guy?” Pete asked Ronnie tentatively.

“Dude.” Ronnie said. “That’s just so wrong.”

“No, dude. Not like that. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with them getting it on.” Pete said. “Just think about it realistically. Think you could do a guy?”

Shocked by the question, Ronnie was completely speechless.

“No way.” Schnieder said frankly. “I just think it’s wrong.”

“Wrong?” Pete asked. “Like morally or like ‘dude that’s jus wrong.”

“Morally.” Schnieder responded. “Look, I don’t judge other people’s choices. Lord knows, I’ve made enough questionable choices, but I just don’t think two guys should do that.”

“What about two girls?” Pete continued the questioning.

“Same thing.” Schnieder responded.

The answer really took Pete by surprise. Most men he met had been disgusted with the thought of male homosexually activity, but sung a very different tune when it came to girl on girl action. Schnieder definitely was a unique individual.

“What about you, Ronnie?” Pete returned his questioning to Ronnie.

“Think I’m with Schnieder on this one.” Ronnie started.

“You?” Pete responded. “Mr. “Dude-it’s-none-of-our-business?”

“No, not the morality thing. I can give a rat’s ass about what other people do.” Ronnie explained. “I just couldn’t do it with a guy.”

They all sat silently and considered the conversation. Ronnie was mulling over the fact that although he was happy for Ben, he hadn’t really considered what Ass must have gone through to make the decision he made. He just assumed that Ass was as happy as Ben.

“I’d do it.” Pete said suddenly.

“What?” Ronnie asked.

“Sure, why not?” Pete said. “I’ve had butt sex with a chick. Hell, I did it last night. And a blow job is a blow job.”

“Except when the dick is in your mouth.” Schnieder said with a somewhat disgusted tone.

Involuntarily, Ronnie burst out laughing. Turning toward Pete, he expected to see him laughing. Instead, Pete was deep in thought.

“Hell, I could suck a dick.” Pete said. “Think I could even take it in the ass. I’d certainly give it a try.”

“Seriously?” Ronnie asked completed shocked at Pete’s admission.

“Sure why not.” Pete responded. “Not as a regular thing. I love pussy way too much. But occasionally maybe.”

“What the fuck?” Ronnie asked.

“Actually, until last night there was no way.” Pete said. “But you should’ve seen Emily and Chelsea going at it. During one of our breaks, they both told me that they had never been with a woman before. They said they were both kinda weirded out at first, but once they got going it was a lot of fun.”

Pausing, Pete looked at Ronnie and actually reveled in the confused look on his face. Pete really did think that he could be with a man. It had nothing to do with morality. When it came to sex, there wasn’t much Pete wouldn’t do. The only boundary he ever drew was age. He like women, not girls. Other than that he’d done just about every else. He loved sex that much. When it came to it, why wouldn’t he mess around with another guy, especially in a group situation?

“Then they said the same thing to me.” Pete continued. “They still wanted, no they actually needed dick.”

“What did you say to that?” Ronnie asked.

“Nothin’.” Pete said. “I just fucked ‘em both again.”

Just then, Ass opened the divider and walked through. He turned and very quietly closed the door. When he turned to face the others, the look on his face betrayed his feelings.

“Dude, what the fuck?” Pete asked shocked to see such a distressed look on his face.

“I am so fucked, you have no idea.” Ass responded.

“What happened?” Pete asked.

“We did it.” Ass responded.

“And?” Pete continued.

Ass paused for a moment trying to decide how to say what he needed to say. Nothing came to him.

“And I’ll never do it again.” He said finally.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The alarm went off for the fourth time, but Annie was still unable to get out of bed. Knowing that she had an early shift, she had gone to bed at a reasonable hour. Then Ronnie called her at two o’clock in the morning and asked if she could talk. How could she say no? There was one thing in her life that she was sure of, she loved Ronnie. It had taken almost everything she had to sleep with him. It took even more to confess what she had done to Tony.

Even though the phone call was rather short, Annie stayed awake for hours. Tossing and turning, she ran the conversation over and over again in her head. She analyzed every word and remembered the tone in his voice when he said them. Did he really mean what he what he said? Did he really still want her? How could anyone want her?

She finally fell asleep four hours after she hung up the phone. The alarm went off again. Forcing herself to get out of bed, she knew she didn’t even have time to take a shower. Quickly, she donned the same uniform that she wore yesterday. Then she went into the bathroom and brushed her teeth. As she pulled her hair back, she considered her make up. But there was no time. She would just have to go with the natural look.

Glancing at her watch, she thought she could still make it on time. As she walked through the house, she noted that everything was in place as it should be. That realization made her feel a little better. For her world to be all right, it had to be in order.

Stepping out of her apartment, she noticed that there were leaves on her car. Suddenly, her world was no longer in order. She knew that if she took the time to clean off the car, she would be late for work. If she was late, that was it. They would fire her. Compulsively, she began to brush the leaves off her car.

“STOP IT!” She said loudly.

Somehow, the word broke through. Instantly, she was able to stop, get in her car, start it and drive to work. Feeling a surge of adrenaline rush though her veins, she smiled to herself.

“Good job.” She said to herself.

This seemingly insignificant action was actually a giant breakthrough for Annie. This would be the first thing she would bring up with her therapist at the next session.

When she arrived at work, she bounded out of her car buoyed by her conquest. Immediately upon entering the restaurant, Mike, the assistant manager, walked over to her.

“Where’s your boyfriend this week?” Mike asked with a sly tone.

“Uh…some where in the Northwest.” Annie responded. “Seattle, I think.”

“How could he go on the road and leave a sweet little piece like you behind.” Mike continued. “Must be getting some on the side.”

“Mike, leave me alone.” Annie said firmly.

Her earlier mood completely shattered. The anxiety began to boil up within her. She just wanted Mike to go away. But instead, he began to move in closer.

“Maybe you should be getting a little sumpin, sumpin too.” Mike continued. “I could make you happy, trust me.”

She wanted to run out. Beginning to shake, Annie thought she was going to cry. But somehow she managed to choke back the tears. Mike was too busy staring at her breasts to notice how upset she was. She turned her head and saw that there were several other waitresses within earshot. One was Mary, who had never been very nice to her. This was probably due to the fact that she had a crush on Ronnie long before Annie arrived on the scene. When they made eye contact, there was something in Mary’s eyes that told her to stand her ground.

“You wanna get off, Mike.” Annie managed to say in a suggested tone.

“That’s what I’m talking about.” Mike responded positively.

Staring directly into his eyes, she was sickened that he actually licked his lips. Mike was a disgusting pig and everyone knew it. Annie had her fill and today was going to be a day of conquests. She stared down the leaves on her car and now she was going to stare down this scum sucking pig.

“Then go fuck yourself.” Annie continued.

“What?” Mike asked his voice betraying his shock.

“GO FUCK YOURSELF!” Annie repeated loudly.

If Mike had been a cartoon, the top of his head would have erupted like a volcano and flames would have shot out of his ears and nose. But since he wasn’t, he simply turned red.

“You little cunt.” He hissed. “That’s it, you’re outta here.”

“For what?” Annie asked indignantly. “Telling you to back off, you pig.”

“No, for being late again.” Mike said in a very haughty tone. “See you been here five minutes and you didn’t punch the time clock. You got you last warning last week.”

Because Mike was completely self-absorbed, he had no idea that he had an audience for the whole conversation. As soon as the other wait staff heard Annie tell Mike to go fuck himself, they abandoned all of their prep work and gathered around to listen. With the exception of Mary after she saw the look in Annie’s eyes, she immediately went to the office and got Julie, the manager.

“That means, you’re fucked you little bitch.” Mike snarled. “All you had to do was treat me right and you still have a job.”

“I’d say you’re the one that’s fucked, Mike.” Julie interrupted.

The words stung Mike like oil spatter from the fryer. As he turned to face Julie’s voice, he was greeted by the faces of five very angry women. All of whom, except Julie, he had hit on in a very unsuccessfully manner during the last week. Julie crossed the restaurant and stood uncomfortably close to Mike.

“Uh, Julie.” Mike said. “Just telling Annie here that she is out of chances.”

“Are you kidding me?” Julie responded. “Do you know how long I have been standing here?”

Not sure how to answer, Mike searched around the room as if some one would step up in his defense. Not seeing anyone, he tried to think of a way out of this situation.

“Uh…no.” He replied.

“Get out.” Julie said. “Go, I will call you when your check is ready.”

It took a moment for the words to sink in to Mike’s brain. He understood what she meant, but he couldn’t understand why she would say it.

“You’re firing me?” Mike asked completely stunned. “For what?”

“Ever heard of sexual harassment?” Julie asked.

“That? That was nothing.” Mike said with a wave of his hand as if to dismiss the conversation. “Just having a little fun.”

Beside herself, Julie struggled to maintain her composure. She had never liked Mike and now she knew why. It infuriated her that he couldn’t see anything wrong with his behavior.

“Look, you just made a pass at a female employee and then threatened to fire her.” Julie explained as patiently as possible. “In front of witnesses, including me. Now get out.”

It could have ended right then, but this was Mike. His total lack of judgment continued.

“This is your fault, you cunt.” He snarled as he pointed his finger at Annie. “I’ll get you and your stupid, stoner boyfriend, too.”

“That’s it.” Julie said. “I’m calling the cops. You will not threaten one of my employees like that.”

“I already called them.” Mary interrupted. “And here they are asshole.”

The cops came in and arrested Mike. While they were in the process of cuffing him, Mary walked over and put her arm around Annie as if she were protecting Annie from the obscenities he directed at her. Finally, he was gone and it was over.

“Thank you.” Annie said to Mary.

“No worries.” Mary replied.

“No really.” Annie continued. “Your look gave me the courage to stand up to him today.”

Mary felt a warm feeling come over her. For the first time, she saw what Ronnie saw in Annie. The vulnerability, the heart, the goodness and the kindness. Annie was the type of person Mary would be proud to have as a friend.

“I’m just glad the bastard is outta here.” Mary assured.






<<< Chapter 24


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Chapter 24 is posted

This chapter took me a little longer to write than the others. It was difficult to capture Anita's feelings and describe why she felt that way. Additionally, I wrote quite a bit of Chapter 24 and for some reason I decided to reread Chapter 22. Good thing I did because I wrote several inconsistencies between the two chapters. It is my position that I fixed all the issue in Chapter 24 and I am sticking to it. Until, of course, one of you points something out. Then I'll back pedal like a cornerback covering a deep route with no safety support. (Oops, I read a tutorial on writing that said I shouldn't use analogies that are out of context. Oh well, I think we can all handle a little football.)

The second reason it was difficult was writing the interaction between Ass and Ben. I would especially like feedback on this relationship. I have no idea how accurate or how believable the story line is. Overall, it is definitely a plausible idea and I am sure that similar relationships have occurred in the past and will again in the future. I am just curious as to whether you think I captured it well. Be kind in the criticism, Ben is my first gay male character.


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The Break - Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Not willing to give an inch, Anita forced herself to think. She knew she was a little rusty, but even on her worst day she was better than this. Sitting in this room listening to this man, she knew she had stumbled onto the story that could bring her back. It was imperative that she take the initiative here. She couldn’t allow him to leave despite of what Ron said.

“Hang on a second.” Anita said to Ron. “Before you decide to leave, give me a minute, okay?”

Looking directly into her eyes as he always did when he was facing of with an adversary, he saw straight inside. She had completely let her guard down. In that moment, he knew what she was about to tell him was the absolute truth.

“Sure, my calendar is clear.” He said wryly.

Relived that he agreed to stay, Anita prepared herself. Feeling a twinge in her stomach, she inhaled deeply and exhaled. Knowing that she was about to do something she had not done in a very long time, she couldn’t hide her nervousness. She needed to get Ron to open up and she needed him to do it right now. Because it was so important to her, she was about to let her guard down and invite some one into her very private, personal world.

“I not really sure how to start.” Anita said tentatively. “I guess I am going to tell you about me.”

Ron eased back in his chair and laid his arms on the arm rest of the overstuffed recliner. Understanding how difficult this was for her, her wanted to give her a little space. Additionally, he wanted to poise his body so that he would put out receptive, open body language. One of his greatest skills was his deep understanding of non-verbal communication. If he presented his posture as relaxed and his eyes full of sympathy, she would feel comfortable enough to reveal everything.

“You saw the tape.” Anita continued. “You’re smart enough to realize that I don’t work there any more. Well, that is just part of the story.”

When Anita paused to take a drink, Ron felt an unbelievable sinking feeling in his stomach. Here he was watching this woman summoning up the courage to reveal herself to him and all he could do was to continue treating her like an opponent that he needed to best. She was his only hope and she was willing to help. Ron needed to let go a little. Actually, he needed to let go a great deal. He needed to make the same decision he already knew Anita made.

“I was doing great.” Anita said. “Hard to believe now, but I was on the fast track to the network.”

“Wow, that is big.” Ron agreed. “Top of your field.”

“Yes, and all I needed was one more story.” Anita said. “When I heard the Pepsi Center blew up. I was … I was …”

Anita paused again. She took a long drink. Then she closed her eyes.

“I-I-I was ecstatic.” She barely whispered as tears ran down her cheek.

“Come again?” Ron said.

“I was ecstatic.” Anita repeated. “And the reason I had that ghoulish smile on my face was because all I could think of during the whole newscast was that I was going network. Not a single thought of the people ...”

At that point, Anita completely broke down. Her body was wracked by sobs. Quickly, Ron got up and crossed the room. Sitting down on the couch next to Anita, her put his arm around her to comfort her. This only made her sob more loudly.

“Nitti?” Elena asked as she rushed out of the bedroom. “Nitti? You okay?”

Hearing her sister, Anita turned to look at her. But she could not stop crying. She held one hand up to her sister. Picking up on the cue, Elena sat down next to her sister and opened her arms. Anita fell into her open bosom and continued to sob uncontrollably.

Elena looked over her sister’s heaving back and gave Ron an accusing look.

“Shush, Nitti.” Elena said softly as she lovingly rocked her sister back and forth. “Shush, honey.”

The crying began to subside. Elena knew that Anita was calming down, so she turned her attention to Ron.

“What did you do to her?” She hissed viciously.

“Maybe right now isn’t the best time?” Ron said as he motioned to Anita.

Ron had seen his share of fiery woman, but nothing matched the look that Elena shot at him. It was the most unnerving feeling. Not even the people he had gotten the better of I business deals had looked at him with such hatred.

“Uh…maybe I’ll just go.” Ron said meekly.

“Good idea.” Elena said.

“No.” Anita said firmly as she suddenly sat upright and wiped the tears from her eyes.

Both her companions sat dumbfounded as they watched her force herself to stop crying with sheer will. Leaning forward, she extracted a tissue from the box on the coffee table and blew her nose.

“I have cried about this enough.” She stated. “We have an interview to conduct. Right, Mr. Harrison.”

“Yes we do.” He said with a smile. The courage she was demonstrating was spurring him forward. “And call me Ron.”

“Thanks for the shoulder, Lena.” She said to her sister. “You can stay if you want to.”

“I think I will.” She said giving Ron a look that told him she was going to keep her eye on him.

Summoning all her energy, Anita regained her composure. She picked up her notebook and flipped back to the where she had started a half hour ago.

“Okay, Mr. Har … Ron.” Anita said. “Let’s start at the beginning. Now, you said your son was in a band.”

“Yeah, Ratdick.”

“Ratdick?” Elena spat in a disgusted tone.

“Lena, please.” Anita said gently. “So, there was a man named Frankie also known as Schnieder that was a roadie in the band.”

“Yes.” Ron replied.

Anita was beginning to feel her legs again. Surprisingly, Ron found it easy to answer the questions.

“He is the man you say was the bomber.” Anita continued.

“Correct.” Ron responded.

“He is also the man you killed.” Anita stated flatly.

“Yes.” Ron replied

Elena let out a gasp and rapidly made a sign of the cross. She gave Anita a horrified look.

“It’s okay, Elena.” Anita reassured her. “Mr. Harrison did kill this man, but he has assured me that he had to and I believe him.”

“You sure?” Elena asked as if Ron was not in the room.

“Lena.” Ron said softly as he looked into her eyes. “May I call you Lena?”

She nodded slightly.

“This man was a very bad man.” Ron said feeling a slight lump in his throat. “He killed thousands of people and he would have killed me if I didn’t kill him. I had to kill him.”

“Okay, let’s not go there yet.” Anita said resuming control of the interview. “One thing I am not sure I understand fully is how you came about suspecting Frankie was up to no good.”

There it was. The question Ron had not answered. It was the thing he hadn’t told anyone, including Ronnie.

“I lied to you when I said that I went to Seattle for a business trip.” Ron admitted. “I went there and stayed with the band for the rest of the shows because I found out that I have cancer.”

Ron stood up and began to pace behind the couch. The women looked forward, not wanting to stare. They knew how uncomfortable this was for him.

“Right after I found out I had it.” Ron continued. “I got them their first gig. Then I got them on the road. I couldn’t join them because I had to go through a round of chemo. It didn’t work, so I wanted to spend the rest of my time with my son.”

“Oh, I am so sorry.” Anita said sincerely.

“Don’t be.” Ron said. “You wanna hear the kick in the pants. When I was in the hospital, they told me I was in remission. So, I am completely fit to stand trial and spend my life in jail.”

Not really knowing how to respond, neither woman said anything. Ron decided to continue.

“So, when I was on tour with the band. I hung out with Schnieder since we are about the same age. He seemed like a decent guy. But I started noticing some strange behavior.”

“What type of behavior?” Anita asked.

“The kind I told you about before.” Ron responded. “You know, he would just check out. Other times he just talked about the evil.”

“The evil?” Anita said quizzically. “Yes, I wrote that down when you mentioned that before. This was important to the story?”

“Yeah, I really thought it was the flashbacks.” Ron explained. “He did two tours in Vietnam. But then I had the extreme displeasure of actually meeting the evil.”

“The evil is a person?” Unable to really grasp what Ron was saying.

Ron paused for a moment, not sure if he should tell them. He knew he had no choice.

“He is flesh and bones.” Ron said. “But I wouldn’t call him a person. He is pure evil and he is still out there.”

“You told me most of this already.” Anita said trying not to sound annoyed. You still haven’t told me how this tie in with your son. So, can you tell me?”

“Yes, I think can.” Ron said matter-of-factly. “As I started hanging around with Schnieder, he told me more about himself. He told me that he was captured on his last day in Vietnam, but not by the Vietnamese. He was captured by the CIA.’

“What?” Anita asked a little too indignantly.

Ron paused and looked her in the eyes. Waiting for her to focus on his eyes, he thought he could get her to believe him.

“Yeah, I know. Sounds like the plot from a bad movie.” Ron said shaking his head as if he still didn’t believe it. “Trust me, it’s not a bad movie. How I wish it was. It’s just a nightmare.”

“I believe him.” Elena said. “No eyes can look like his and lie.”

Completing taken off guard, Ron turned to look at Elena. He had actually forgotten that she was there, but now he glad he was.

“Thanks, Lena.” Ron responded. “So, he told me how the tortured him and basically crushed him so badly that he didn’t even know his name for five years. Of course, I thought he was bullshitting me, until the night I saw him with the evil. Actually, the guy’s name is Ian Gegger. I am still not sure why he didn’t kill me that night. Maybe he knew I would be a good patsy.”

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once they completed the money talk, Ass and Ben headed to the back of the bus. Still tired, they laid down next to each other on one of the beds.

“Sorry about last night.” Ass said to Ben. “That show took a lot out of me.”

“It’s cool.” Ben said. “Actually, I fell asleep about the same time you did.”

“So, we really haven’t talked about this.” Ass said.

Ben propped himself up on his elbow and looked down at his friend who was lying on his back next to him.

“Are you sure you are ready to talk about it, Eddie?” Ben asked.

“Yeah, I think so.” Ass replied. “It is pretty weird for, you know? I mean, like…uh…it’s…I know it feels good and all – kissing you and stuff. But it is just really hard … uh … difficult to take that step.”

“But do you even want to try?” Ben asked.

“Well…yeah…I told you …” Ass started.

Before he could finish his sentence, Ben leaned over and began kissing him. Eddie responded vigorously. After kissing for a moment, Ass pushed Ben up and off him, Ben rolled on to his back. At that moment, he expected Ass to stop. But he didn’t. He simply rolled on top of Ben and began kissing him more aggressively. Although he initiated it this time, Ben was glad that Eddie wanted to assume the dominant position. In all his other relationships, he had always felt more comfortable when his partner took the lead.

Eddie put his leg over Ben’s thighs and began to rub his hardness on his friend’s leg. Ben felt himself become aroused. Fully engulfed in the moment, he reached between his thigh and Eddie and began stroking him though his jeans. Almost instantly, Eddie responded by rubbing Ben. They continue kissing and petting for what seemed to be a very long time.

At some point, Ben had freed Eddie from his jeans. Gently, he pushed on Eddie’s chest. Picking up on the cue, Eddie rolled to his back and watched as Ben slid down and took Eddie into his mouth. Eddie closed his eyes.

“Oh, that feels so good.” Eddie said. “Yeah, that’s it.”

Ben continued to lick and stroke Eddie for several minutes. Occasionally, he would look up and see Eddie looking back at him. The look in Eddie’s eyes encouraged him to pay more attention to what he was doing.

“Eddie?” Ben asked.

Even though he had taken his mouth off of Eddie, he continued to stroke him vigorously with his hand.

“Yeah.” Eddie reply.

“You wanna fuck me?” Ben asked softly.

“Yeah.” Eddie said convincingly.

Ben rolled off Eddie, stood up and removed his clothing. At the same time, Eddie managed to remove his clothes. He sat up in the bed as Ben reached into the over head flipper and grabbed a bottle of KY liquid gel.

“Put some of this on.” He said as he handed the bottle to Eddie.

Then he crawled back into bed on positioned himself on his hands and knees with his rear end facing Eddie.

“Now, put it in me.” He instructed.

Eddie got into position behind Ben and slowing began pressing himself against his rectum. Feeling a bit of resistance, he pushed harder and felt himself slide in a few inches. He slid himself back and then forward again. This time he went a little deeper, a little more aggressively.

“That’s it, fuck me Eddie.” Ben said.

Eddie obliged and began sliding back and forth, sometimes going deep. Other times, just a short stroke. Soon they fell into a rhythm, their rhythm. It was the perfect speed for both of them. Eddie placed his hands on Ben’s hips and pulled him back firmly. Then he gently pushed back on Ben’s hips sliding him down his shaft. He repeated the motion. This time he penetrated even deeper shoving his full length into Ben.

“Oh, fuck yeah.” Ben said. “Pull on me.”

“What?” Eddie asked.

“Grab my dick and pull.” Ben continued.

Reaching around, Eddie took Ben in his hand and began stroke as if he were stroking himself. It felt very strange to have Ben in his hand. It felt much different than when he touched himself. Ben was a little bit longer, but not as big around as he was. Soon, he forgot that he was stroking another man.

They continued for a few more minutes until Eddie felt Ben swell and begin to spasm.

“Oh, God yeah.” Ben cried out as his load shot out on to the bed. “Squeeze it, squeeze it. Yes, yes, uh … yes.”

Hearing Ben triggered Eddie’s release. He felt the familiar explosion as he emptied himself into Ben.

“Ahhhh.” Eddie said as he completed his orgasm.

Pausing for a moment to savor the release, Eddie pulled his hand back and saw the evidence of Ben’s orgasm on his hand. Slowing he pulled out and laid down on his back. Ben turned around and joined him. Snuggling into the crook of Eddie’s arm, Ben could not remember a time that he had been so satisfied. The moment he had waited for ten year to happen finally did and it was amazing. Eddie was the best lover he had ever had. Even more importantly, this was so much more than he had prior to this. All the other men he had been with were mainly for sex, this was love. This was making love.

Eddie looked over and saw the contented smile on Ben’s face as he closed his eyes and snuggled in deeper. The excitement of the last half hour had evaporated and Eddie lay there horrified with what he had just done. Sure, it had felt good physically. But he was completely disgusted with himself. He simply was not gay. As much as he loved Ben, he knew right then that they would never do that again. Eddie could not bring himself to do it. He would not allow himself to do it. Not feeling the way he felt right now.

The disgust was quickly replaced by dread as he looked down at his now sleeping partner.

“How are we ever going to get past this?” He thought.

Knowing Ben, he was now going to expect that he and Eddie were lovers, partners, boyfriends. No, that was not going to happen. Eddie was not going to have a boyfriend no matter what. He liked women, he loved women and he was going make love to women. But he really had no idea how to tell Ben that.

“Oh, Eddie.” He said to himself. “You dumbass. What fucking can of worms did you just open?”

As he lay there holding Ben, Eddie wished he was any where other than where he was right now. At least Ben had fallen asleep giving him time to think through this and he was going to need some time.






<<< Chapter 23


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Thursday, March 16, 2006

Very Funny

At first, I was livid. Words cannot express how incredibly pissed off I was when I dialed 1-212-639-9675. If you read my previous posting, you know that I had received an email from the scheduling intern from the Late Show with David Lettermen. The email said Dave was considering having me on the show and that I should let them know my availability on March 29, 2006.

Allowing excitement to overcome common sense, I dialed the number fully expecting to speak with Ms. Ida Lucier. Really, I have no idea how I missed it. Maybe it's because I have known three people with the last name Lucier. I went to school from third grade until my senior year with a woman with the last name Lucier and her brother. While I was working in Denver, I worked for several years with another man named Lucier. Or maybe I was just so caught up in the moment that I didn't realize that with the right inflection, Ida Lucier becomes "I da loser"

Since I was expecting to hear the cheery voice of a Late Show intern, imagine my shock when I heard the battle-hardened, brittle, heavily accented New Yorker answer by saying:

"New York City Department of Sanitation. What can I do for you."

First, I was confused. Then, as I said earlier, anger of biblical proportions built deep within me. Just when I thought I was going to go over the top, I just started laughing.

I have to admit, not only is it funny, it's pretty damn creative. Not only that, some one has actually been reading enough to go to some pretty elaborate lengths to play a practical joke on me. Think about it. Whoever did this, had to set up the idalucier@gmail.com account to send me the message. Yes, thank you, that should have been my first clue. Then the perpetrator had to write a fairly convincing email - come on - you wanted to believe it, too. But what really set this apart, I think, was giving me the number for the New York City Department of Sanitation.

Therefore, all I can say is "Well Done". Ya got me, hook, line and sinker - you rat bastard! If I ever find out who did this, I'll ... I'll ... I'll buy you a beer, cause I really do think that this was a funny prank - thanks for playing.

Lesson learned, check out the emails before I go blogging my mouth off.


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Unbelievable

I just got this email from the Late Show. I am shocked, stunned and amazing. Could this really be true?

Paul,

Thank you for your interest in appearing on the Late Show with David Lettermen. Last week, Mr. Lettermen was able to review your blog. He was very impressed with your writing, wry sense of humor and your obvious passion for blogging.

In addition to your emails, we received several from your readers requesting that you be on our show. It seems you have quite a following. Because of this, Mr. Lettermen asked me to contact you about being a guest on the Late Show.

Prior to scheduling guest, we conduct a phone interview. I would like to schedule a screening with you on March 29, 2006. Please let me know your availability between 9:00 AM and 12:00 PM EST on that day.

Warmest Regards,

Ida Lucier
Scheduling Intern
51 West 52 Street
New York, New York 10019-6188
Phone: (212) 639-9675
Fax: (212) 504-4115


I'm totally stoked! Right now I have some meetings, so I'll call as soon as I can. As always, I let you know how it goes.


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Chapter 23 - like anyone cares

I did finish and post Chapter 23. Sometimes I just don't know why I even bother. It is getting harder and harder to post new stuff. I know that I have told you that I write because I love it. That is a true statement. But there is more to it than that. I like to write because I want to communicate with others. I want people to think what I write is relevant and interesting enough to come back and read more.

Along the way, I have shared with you all of the things I have done to increase traffic. For a while, it really seemed to be working well. Now I have hit a plateau and it has been pretty difficult. Maybe the early "success" set my expectation level too high. Is it unreasonable to think that I would have a following in just 2 months?

All I know right now is that it seems like nothing I am doing is increasing traffic. I have kept up posting on a daily basis, I have checked all the search engines and blog directories I have submitted to. Everything appears to be in order. It's weird, Blogger seems to have throttled me back. I use to get one or two hits immediately after posting, but now I only seem to get one hit if any at all. I just don't get it.

One thing is for sure, the incessant checking of stats and compulsive drive to increase traffic is starting to wear on me. I was writing for enjoyment and relaxation and now that I have immersed myself in blogging, it's like I can't stop. I have to ask myself if this is how I want to write. I'll let you know how it goes.


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The Break - Chapter 23

Chapter 23

Once again, Ronnie was the first one on the bus. For some reason, he always popped out of bed the morning after a show. It was really odd considering he usually felt as if he was completely drained. Sleep just didn’t help.

He pulled his laptop out of his backpack and booted it up. The satellite internet feed was another really cool feature of the bus. It did come with a price. The record company expected Ronnie to check his email every day.

With that happened between Ass and Ben yesterday, Ronnie forgot to check his email. The last time he forgot, Randy, the A and R guy, came down pretty hard on him. They almost missed a gig that got added in Boise at the last minute. Feeling a little nervous, Ronnie went directly to his email as soon as the wireless icon showed that there was a connection.

In his list of contacts, he saw them. There were two messages from Randy. One was dated yesterday, the other was dated today.

“Ah shit.” Ronnie said out loud. “Figures.”

Quickly he opened the oldest message.

Ronnie,

Great news, dude. The CD is flying off the shelves. Tons of stations are playing “Debbie”. It’s a freaking monster. It’s debuted on the charts, number 43.

Due to the success, we have managed to set up eight new, very high paying gigs on the west coast over the next month and we are trying to get a few more. I’ll send you the details tomorrow.

Be cool,

Randy

Not really sure he believed what he saw. Ronnie read and reread the message. It was almost more than he could fathom. Trying to make sense of the implications of this message, he was suddenly jolted by a loud voice.

“Oh, Ronnie, my man.” Pete said. “You have no idea how fucking great last night was.”

“Hey, Pete.” Ronnie responded in a faraway voice.

“What’s with you?” Pete asked immediately picking up on Ronnie’s tepid response.

Before Ronnie could respond, Ben and Ass walked on to the bus. Followed almost immediately by Schnieder.

“What’s going on?” Ass asked sensing the awkwardness of the situation.

Feeling everyone’s eyes on him, it finally hit Ronnie. Feeling the adrenaline coursing through his veins, he suddenly found his voice.

“Dudes, you have no idea.” He said excitedly. “This is huge, but I don’t have all the info yet. I have to open the other email.”

“What are you talking about?” Pete asked.

“I got an email from Randy.” Ronnie started. “He said that “Debbie” is number 43 on the charts.”

Stunned, the group stood and stared at each other. For a moment, they seemed as if they could not even breathe.

“HOLY SHIT!” Pete exclaimed. “That’s what I’m talking about.”

“Congratulations boys.” Schnieder said. “Looks like you are on your way.”

Shaking each of the boy’s hands in turn, Schnieder patted them on the back.

“Hang on a sec.” Ronnie interrupted. “Randy also said they booked eight more shows for us in the next month and they want to book more. I have another email from him that I haven’t opened.”

“Well, open it.” Pete said loudly.

The group silently stood and watched Ronnie open the email. They watched as Ronnie’s eyes moved back and forth. He emitted a low whistle.

“Read it would ya.” Pete said anxiously. “Read it.

“Says that our cut will be twenty-five grand.” Ronnie said

“That’s like a little over three grand a show.” Pete said doing the math in his head. “So, we’re each going to get like $800 more this month? That’s good news.”

“No, dude.” Ronnie said full of disbelief. “We get twenty-five grand per show. That means we would get like forty thousand each in the next month.”

Once again, none of them knew how to react. Even in their wildest dreams they never imagined that they would get that kind of money for playing music. Ben fell onto the couch and Ass joined him there. Pete placed his hand on his forehead as if to check his temperature.

Ronnie allowed the adrenaline to rush to hit its peak. Then he was able to control it rather than let it control him. It was exactly the feeling he got when he was going to perform. The same feeling that in the past made him throw up. After throwing up before the first several gigs, Ronnie learned to ride the peak without getting sick. Now that he was in the zone, everything slowed down just like when he was on stage. The pieces began to fall in place.

“Dudes.” Ronnie said calmly. “Let’s not get caught up in this.”

“What are you talking about”?” Pete managed.

“I mean. This is an offer.” Ronnie said his mind working on a new level. “We don’t have to take this.”

Dumbfounded, the others simply stared at Ronnie. Ronnie stared back. His mind continued to work through the situation. He could hear his father counseling him. For a moment, he thought he should call him, tell him the news and ask his advice. Suddenly, everything was clear. He would call his father, but after he worked through this with the guys.

Up to this point, they had been playing because they loved to play. That is the reason they were going to continue to play. But as long as they had the opportunity to take economic advantage of the situation, Ronnie was going to make sure they got the best deal they could.

Technically, he had always been the leader of the band. Now, it was time to step up and act like it. All he had to do was to convince the boys that it was in their best interest to treat this like a business deal. One mistake they had to avoid was jumping at this deal like a bunch of dumbass kids which is exactly what the record company expected them to do. The one thing they didn’t realize is that they were dealing with the son of Big Ron Harrison.

“Let’s not get all giddy like a virgin getting a peek at her first dick, all right.” Ron said authoritatively. “If there is one thing my old man taught me is, you never take the first offer.”

“What are you talking about?” Pete said. “They’re going to give us two hundred thousand dollars for a month of gigs.”

“Yeah, but think about it.” Ronnie encouraged. “Why do you think they are going to offer us this much?”

“Not following.” Pete said.

It occurred to Ronnie that the others had never been in this type of situation. Not that he had, but he had seen his father in action on several occasions. The one thing he saw every time was that Big Ron always kept his cool. He never flinched.

“Okay, looking at these arenas they seat like ten, twelve thousand.” Ronnie explained. “And they are charging say fifty bucks a pop for tix, right?”

“Sure, I guess.” Pete said. Trying to follow.

“So, that’s like a half million per show.” Ronnie continued. “So they want to pay us like five percent?”

“What’s your point?” Pete asked harshly.

Ronnie maintained his composure. He knew all he needed to do was to remain patient and Pete would get it.

“Point is, if we are going to play we should get what we deserve. It’s not like we’re going to get a ton more money.” Ronnie said. “But we want to let them know that we aren’t just a bunch of kids that they can push around. Look, Pete this is just the beginning, okay. We are fucking great and we are going places. Let’s not just act like little puppy dogs.”

“I still …” Pete started.

The other two band mates were listening intently and watching just as closely.

“Ronnie’s right.” Ben said uncharacteristically.

Everyone turned to look at Ben.

“What?” Ben asked. “I can speak.”

Having watched Ronnie intently, Ass saw the deliberation in Ronnie’s actions and the passion in his eyes.

“I agree.” Ass pitched in. “We need to do some negotiating. Actually, Ronnie does.”

“Huh?” Pete questioned.

In that moment, Ass understood that the relationships within the band changed. Informally, it was understood that Ronnie was the leader. Not only did he write the songs, he was extremely talented guitar player. Although Pete was technically a better guitar player and he and Ben were the heart of the music, Ronnie’s playing was the soul of the band. And now it was very apparent that he understood the business better than any of the rest did.

“Look, he is our leader.” Ass continued. “He got us this far, let him go.”

“Ah right.” Pete said as he shook his head. “I was happy with eight hundred.”

Everyone laughed harder than they should have. Ronnie turned back to the email.

“Anyone want to know where we are going to play?” He asked.

“Yeah.” They all responded.

“Looks like from here we go to Seattle, then Bellingham, Vancouver, British Columbia – where the hell is Surrey, British Columbia?”

“No freakin’ clue.” Pete said. "Where the hell is British Columbia?"

“In Canada, dumbass.” Ass chided.

Ronnie and Ben laughed heartily. Pete looked a little stunned, but then he joined in the laughter. Schnieder was staring blankly out the window.

“No shit, Canada huh?" Pete asked.

“Then it’s on to Victoria, British Columbia, Vancouver, Washington ...

“You already said Vancouver.” Pete said.

Again, roars of laughter.

“What? He did.” Pete said defensively.

“Dude, there is a Vancouver in British Columbia and one in Washington.” Ass informed him.

“Well, shit.” Pete said. “I didn’t know. I’ve never even been in this state.”

Pete looked down and kicked at a gum wrapper that was on the floor of bus.

"I don’t even really know where Seattle is.” Pete admitted. "Isn't like on the ocean or something?"

"Dude, maybe you should look at a map sometime." Ass chided.

“Cut him a break.” Ronnie said with a little smile. “Besides, it's too easy."

Ronnie slapped Pete on the shoulder and gave him a big smile. Pete responded with a smile of his own.

"Last one is in Portland." Ronnie stated. "Guess we won’t be going home for a while.” Ronnie said. “Is everyone cool with that?”

“Hell, yeah.” Pete said.

“Fuckin’ A” Ass agreed.

“Uh-huh.” Ben added eloquently.

Ronnie looked over his band mates, his friends, his family. He felt a huge smile forming on his face. This was what they had set out to do, but what made it even better was that he knew in his heart that it was just the beginning.

“All right then, Dudes.” He said cheerfully. “Let’s talk about our strategy with Randy. What are we willing to accept?”
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As he sat there his blood began to boil. This was completely unacceptable and he wasn’t going to take it.

“Put it back.” He snarled.

“No.” The other man responded.

Standing, he quickly moved toward the other man menacingly.

“I said, put it back.” He said as he slowly stroked his black vest. “It’s “One Day at a Time”. You know I have to watch it. Now put it back.”

The other man simply glared at Frankie and waited for the onslaught. But it never came. Fortunately for him, the attendants saw that Frankie was getting worked up. Quickly, they hustled up next to him. One gently placed his hand on Frankie’s right bicep. The other reached up and changed the station to “One Day at a Time”.

“It’s okay, Frankie.” The man holding his arm said.

“Don’t call me that.” Frankie said.

“It’s okay, Schnieder.” The man said soothingly, calling him his adopted name.”

Instantly, the situation calmed down as Schnieder became engrossed in the television. He just stood staring at the screen.

“Evenin’, Ms Romano…” The actor’s voice said.

“There I am. There I am.” Frankie said as he pointed at the screen. “It was so good there, before they had to move.”

Knowing that he was calm, the too attendants let go and walked over to the other man.

“Are you fucking crazy?” The first attendant asked the other patient. “You know what he did to the last guy – you saw it.”

“Yeah, well maybe I wanna get outta here.” The man responded.

“In a body bag?” The second attendant said.

“Fuck you.” The other patient replied.

“Just leave him alone.” The first attendant said. “I don’t want to have to clean up the mess.”

The attendants walked slowly back to the desk. They kept there eyes on both men for a few minutes. But when the nurse returned to the desk, the two men turned their attention to her. Laughing and joking, they were no longer concerned with what was happening in the TV room. Neither of them saw anything, but they heard the body hit the floor.

Turning around, they saw the patient they had warned laying on the floor. There was no blood, but his neck was at a very strange angle. Frankie was still standing exactly where he had been when they left. He was at least forty feet from where the body was. It appeared that Frankie was still engrossed in the television show.

The men closed the ground to the body in seconds. They checked for vital signs even though they both knew there was no hope that they would find anything. The first attendant looked up from the body and saw that Frankie was smiling.

“Take care of this.” He said quietly to his partner.

“Okay.”

The first attendant got up and crossed the room to Frankie.

“What did you do?” He asked Frankie. “More importantly, how did you do it?”

Frankie just stood motionless, eyes glued to the television.

“I asked you a question.” The attendant hissed. “Answer me.”

But Frankie just continued watching television. Suddenly, the attendant kicked Frankie in the knee. Silently, Frankie fell to the ground. Before he hit the ground the attendant kicked him three more times. Still Frankie didn’t emit a sound.

“You’ll talk.” The attendant snarled at him. “Tonight, you’ll talk.”

The guard kicked him two more times for good measure. He was preparing to kick him again when he heard the sound of the gurney wheels on the freshly waxed floor.

It took several hours for the nurses to remove the body and for the police to investigate the scene. During that time, they interviewed Frankie and let him go back to the room where he was secured for the evening.

The last thing the police wanted to do was to interview the attendant that had kicked Frankie. But he was no longer in the room. They looked for him at the nurse’s station, the bathrooms, the cafeteria and the locker room. Finally, they found him lying on the floor in the janitor’s closet. His were eyes bugling out because his wind pipe had been crushed.

Immediately, the other attendant led the police to Frankie’s room. When they arrived, the door was locked from the outside. They opened the door to find Frankie sleeping soundly in his bed.






<<< Chapter 22


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Thinking of quiting

Over the past two months, I have posted over 175 entries on my blogs. In my opinion, I have put up some pretty interesting stuff. Some of it funny, some sad, some completely ridiculus. But all and all fairly entertaining. Over the first seven weeks, more and more visitors stopped by every day. For the last week, it has been depressing how few people have visited my blogs.

I am very perplexed. Really, I update my blogs daily. I tag my posts with Technorati and Ice Rocket tags. Frequently, I check to make sure my blog is registered in the directories. Google has been running an ad for me every day for the last 30 days. It is almost as if I am being boycotted. When I do a search on the tag rebeleyeball at IceRocket, the most recent post is five days ago. At Technorati, it's even worse. The most recent update they have listed is 9 days ago. Even though I have posted 10 new entries tagged with rebeleyball for both IceRocket and Technorati in that time. On Yahoo! I have slipped from the fourth listing for a search for "Paul Gavin" to the fourth page!

Maybe I should have taken the hint when I got blown off the first time. Maybe I'm not half the writer, blogger I think I am. Maybe I should just hang it up. I have better things to do.


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My third and last email to David Lettermen

Since I believe the third time is a charm, I wrote another email to David Lettermen. Since I not a damn fool, this will be my last. Here's the email:

Dave,

Once again it's Rebeleyeball again. I am somewhat dismayed that you haven't contacted me to be on the show. In my last two emails, I explained to you how important it was to my reader that you have me on the show. Like I said, she is really going to be upset if you don't have me on. So, what do I need to do to get on the show? A stupid human trick? I could bend my knees backwards or I could fold my tongue in several different shapes. I'd offer a stupid pet trick, but I don't have a pet. I'd even offer to have a pro-wrestler bitch slap me. What's it going to be, Dave? What's it going to be?

Paul Gavin

-------------------------------------------------------

So how about doing me a favor, would ya? Follow this link Late Show Feedback to the show's feedback form and ask, no demand, that Dave have me on the show. This is the third time I have written him. And I would sure like to get a focused email campaign going. If you're blogging, I know you don't have anything else to do. Imagine, you could be a part of getting me on nationally broadcast TV show. Think of the story you could tell you family and friends. "Uh...I helped get this guy on TV once." They'll be riveted, hanging on your every word.

Here, I'll even give you the text to copy and paste right into the little box:

Yo Dave!

The Rebeleyeball, sometimes know as Paul Gavin, is the best darn blogger at Misadventures of a 42-year old writer wannabe. I think he's a hoot. Gotta see him on your show, Dave - gotta. Hey, I even hear he's an ex-Hoosier just like you and Bobby Knight. Now that would be a show, Dave, Bobby and Paul - an ex-Hoosier reunion show.

Be cool to The Rebeleyeball. Trust me, your ratings will barely even move.

Late,

insert your name here

Thank you in advance for your participation.


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Here's Chapter 22

Here's the next chapter. This is the third chapter this week. In this chapter, Anita and Ron begin talking through Ron's version of events. After a while, you are going to get use to seeing Anita and Ron together. The second half of the chapter is back stage after the show in Spokane. In the next chapter well get back to the boys on the road - eventually they will get to Denver.

So, what's going on here? This weekend has been the slowest ever. Is my stuff no good? Don't I keep anyone interested? Is anyone reading this at all? Is my stuff just bad? Should I even bother?


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The Break - Chapter 22

Chapter 22

Not wanting the moment to pass, Anita frantically looked through the drawers trying to find a notebook. In her years as a journalist, she learned that when people wanted to talk you need to listen. You may never get another chance. Most people do not freely pour their hearts out to strangers. Anita was sure that this was especially true with a man like Ron.

Another lesson she learned the hard way is that you absolutely must take detailed notes of every conversation which is why she was still looking for a blank notebook.

“Where did she put those?” Anita asked herself.

While Anita had to admit that Elena had been invaluable in her recovery, she found her tendency to organize everything unnerving. This was particular true of writing instruments. Anita had developed a habit of leaving pens, pencils and notebooks all over the apartment in case she suddenly got an idea. Finally, she located a brand new pad in the third drawer. Until Elena’s arrival, the drawer had been the repository for screw drivers, allen wrenches and various other small tools frequently required in the kitchen.

Trying to move quickly but not appear to be in a panic, Anita returned to the living room.

“Found one.” She said full of false cheer. “Now you were talking about a guy named Frankie Schnieder?”

“His real name is Frankie, but the called him Schnieder.” Ron corrected her.

“Uh…okay.” Anita said trying to get organized.

Three months laying around feeling sorry for herself had left Anita a little rusty. A quick moment of self-talk was just the thing she needed to get her going. She began using the technique when she sought out a clinical psychologist to help her quit smoking.

“Come on, Anita.” She said to herself in the stern voice she needed to hear. “You can do this. Focus. Get organized. Don’t ask to many questions. Let the information flow from Ron. He wants to talk – let him. You can do this. You can do this. Now do it.”

The lecture only took a brief moment. Ron didn’t even realize that there was a hesitation.

“This sounds like it is pretty involved.” Anita said. “I think you better start at the beginning.”

“Whoa…the beginning…” Ron said almost absentmindedly. “Which beginning would you like to hear about?”

“How about the beginning of this story?” Anita said allowing her impatience to show. “I’m sorry, that sounded so rude. But I would like to talk about the explosion at the Pepsi Center.”

“Of course.” Ron replied. “The question just sent me back a bit. Since the explosion, I have spent quite a bit of time examining my past.”

Ron paused for a moment and stretched his arms of his head. Inhaling deeply, he blew the air out.

“My son is in a band called ‘Ratdick’. Ron started.

“Interesting name.” Anita commented.

“It fits the music.” Ron said in an offhanded manner.

“That bad, huh?” Anita asked miss judging the statement as disapproval.

“Actually, they’re fantastic.” Ron said as a pang of sadness hit him. “Er...were, I guess.”

“Sorry, what?” Anita asked frustrated with herself for not being able to follow Ron.

Ron reached up and wiped his mouth. He looked at his hand and pondered the brownish deposit that had most recent occupied the cracks at the corners of his mouth.

“Do you have anything to drink?” Ron asked Anita.

“Of yes. Forgive me.” Anita said quickly obviously embarrassed. “I’m so rude. Would you like a soft drink, pop, juice or water? Or would you like alcohol?”

“A beer would be great.” Ron responded. “Doesn’t matter what kind.”

Anita walked to the refrigerator and retrieved a beer and a Diet Coke for herself.

“Well, my son’s band was really good.” Ron started again. “That’s why we were at the Pepsi Center. They were actually going to open for U2.”

“Open for U2?” Anita asked skeptically.

“Apparently, the some of the guys or the road crew or someone associated with U2 caught my son’s band in Seattle or Portland, some where out west. And they were impressed. They had a few open dates.” Ron explained. “So, they make the deal to have them open in Salt Lake City, Denver, Dallas, Houston and San Antonio.”

“So, that explains why you were at the Pepsi Center.” Anita confirmed his statement to this point. “But who is this Frankie?”

“The guy is like fifty or so.” Ron said. “Not really sure how my son met him, but he has known him for sometime. When they started touring, Ronnie, my son Ron, Jr, hired Frankie to be his roadie.”

Ron paused, took a long drink from his beer. Closing his eyes, he vigorously rubber his eyes as if he was trying to clear the thoughts from his brain. Briefly, he considered getting up, walking out of the apartment and never speaking about this again – ever. Instead, he decided the only thing he could was get it out.

“Turns out, Frankie is a Vietnam vet with some serious issues.” Ron continued as if he had never paused. “I had to go up to Seattle from business at the same time the boys were playing. I got a backstage pass and took in the show.”

“And you saw something there?” Anita asked the obvious question.

“I didn’t think much of it at the time, but yes I did.” Ron replied. About quarter of the way into the show Schnieder … Frankie, he disappears out the service door. Being the curious type, I follow him.”

Another pause, another drink.

“I slip out the door and I see Frankie standing at attention if front of this other guy I’d never seen before. The guy is walking around Frankie like he was inspecting him. I found the whole thing a little weird, but I figure what the hell, none of my business.”

“So how does this tie in?” Anita asked.

“Well, I didn’t really want to make a big deal or anything.” Ron started as he shifted his weight uncomfortable. “But I just couldn’t get it out of my head. It didn’t add up. So, I was having a conversation with Ronnie and I asked him if he noticed anything strange about Frankie and he told me about the evil.”

“The evil?” Anita asked in a puzzled tone.

This time the pause lasted quite a bit longer. Ron was weighing whether or not he should even try explaining this to Anita. He saw the look on the police officer’s face when he told them. Then he determined this is the only chance he had at getting the real story out.

“Ronnie told me that every once and a while Frankie would just freak out and get all scared and start talking about the evil.” Ron said tentatively.

He looked into Anita’s eyes to see if she believed him. Much to his surprise, he saw that she was with him. Instantly, he felt more relaxed, more confident.

“Ronnie said that he found Frankie shaking and scared to death.” Ron continued. “Then he tell Ronnie that he saw the evil. Then five minutes later, he would be fine and didn’t remember what happened to them.”

“That’s pretty strange.” Anita commented.

“That’s what I thought.” Ron said. “Then I remembered the guy that Frankie was talking to. Something didn’t smell right. So, I decided to see if I could figure out what was going on.”

“Really?” Anita asked. “Just because of that?”

“I know it sounds strange.” Ron said. “But you didn’t see these guys in the alley. And it was Ronnie. I mean, I haven’t been the greatest father, but I needed to make sure he was okay – understand?”

“Maybe.” Anita responded honestly. “But I’m still not sure about this. It seems a little thin.”

Slightly shocked by Anita’s attitude, Ron sat back and finished his beer. He sat for a moment and considered it. Then he thought about what he had just told Anita and he wasn’t sure if he would even believe it.

“It is thin.” Ron stated matter-of-factly. “But I think it has more to do with how I am telling it.”

“What?” Anita asked.

From this conversation, Ron knew he could trust Anita. But he had no idea if he could get himself to let go enough to get the whole story out so it was believable.

“Anita, I am so use to being guarded about myself.” Ron said as he leaned forward toward her, folding his hands and rested his arms on his thighs. “I negotiate for a living. I don’t give out information easily. I have learned to hold back since I never want to reveal more than I have to. I realize that I have to loosen up a bit to tell this story.”

“You have to do more than that.” Anita said frankly as she put her hand over his hands and squeezed in a reassuring manner. “You have to trust me completely. Ron, you have to tell me the whole story.”

“I know.” He agreed. “But it’s not going to be easy and it is not going to be in one sitting.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Looking way from Schnieder, Ronnie saw that Pete was well on his way to making it with the woman from the audience. In fact, Pete had liberated one of her breasts from the skimpy blouse that she was wearing by reaching in and pulling it out. Feigning shock, the woman slapped at Pete and squealed loudly. But she did nothing to cover her now exposed breast. Her friend rolled her eyes indignantly as if she we completely disgusted with her friend. But then when she thought no one was looking, she turned her eyes back to her friend’s exposed breast.

As much as Ronnie was enjoying the view, he looked away to see what Ass and Ben were up to. They were standing talking easily to one another. Ronnie went over.

“Great show, gentlemen.” He said as a broad smile formed on his face.”

Dude, you’re tellin’ us.” Ass spoke for the entire rhythm section. “I don’t think I …we…all of us have ever played better.”

“You too, huh?” Ronnie replied as he patted Ass on the back. “I was worried that it was just me.”

The three looked at each other and could not stop smiling.

“I hate to say this.” Ronnie started. “But we are actually damn good.”

“You know, as much as I hate that you said that.” Ass said good-naturedly. “But I agree.”

“Dude.” Ben added his full agreement.

“You guys up for looking for what there is to do on a Wednesday night in Spokane, Washington?” Ronnie asked.

The two exchanged a look.

“Uh…hey…you know…” Ass tried. “We…uh…got some things to talk about.”

“Oh yeah, it’s cool.” Ronnie said.

Before he walked away, he hugged both his band-mates. Real hugs, full of love and support. No further words were necessary. Ronnie just turned and walked over to Pete.

Things between Pete and the two girls were escalating quickly. The one he had admired from stage had her shirt completely open with both her breast in full view. Pete was gently stroking her left breast. Her friend was subtly stroking her right. Her eyes betrayed the combination of excitement and mortification that Ronnie had seen in Ass’ eyes when he opened the divider on the bus. Because of this, he guessed that it was the first time she had touched her friend’s breast and she was genuinely surprised by how much it excited her. Ronnie couldn’t be absolutely sure, but the angle of her other arm indicated that she might be touch herself as well.

“Looks like you all are having a good time.” Ronnie said.

“Ronnie, my man.” Pete said magnanimously. “This is Emily.

Pete took his hand off Emily’s breast long enough to wave his hand toward Ronnie. Once again, Pete used his right hand to gesture to the other woman.

“And this, my man.” Pete said as if he was introducing Ronnie to his next girlfriend. “Is Chelsea.”

“Hi, Emily. Hi, Chelsea.” Ronnie responded.

“Hey Ronnie.” Emily gushed full of horny anticipation. “Great set. You guys are awesome.”

“Thanks.” Ronnie responded.

“Hi, Ronnie.” Chelsea responded less than enthusiastically.

Ronnie picked up on it immediately. Looking into Chelsea’s eyes, he obviously turned his eyes to Emily’s breast. As he thought, Chelsea’s eyes followed his. Then he looked back at Chelsea and smiled. The signal was well received.

“You were great.” Chelsea added appreciatively. “I had a great time.”

“Thanks, Chelsea.” Ronnie said. “Think the rest of your night is going to work out pretty well, if you want it to.”

Both knew that Chelsea wanted an excuse to be with her friend and Pete was about to provide her with the perfect opportunity.

“So, dude.” Pete said completely oblivious to the non-verbal conversation that had just occurred between Ronnie and Chelsea. “Ready to do some partying with me and the girls?”

“Ah, I think I’ll pass.” Ronnie said. “I’m going to hang out with Ben and Ass.”

Looking at Chelsea, Ronnie saw a huge smile spread across her face. This time her eyes were full of excitement without even a hint of reservation that he had seen before. It was as if Ronnie’s gesture had emboldened her. Another human saw her lust for Emily and encouraged her. In fact, she began to obviously stroke Emily’s breast.

“You stop.” Emily said without much conviction.

She giggled as she pushed her breast closer to Chelsea and slid her right hand onto Chelsea’s bottom.

“You’re not supposed to do that.” She continued her false protest.

“Whatever.” Chelsea responded.

Not sticking around for the rest, Ronnie decided to go back to the hotel. As he began to walk, Ronnie began to feel the fatigue. Not buoyed by sexual energy as the other members of the band, Ronnie just wanted to lie down and let sleep overtake him.

On the way back to the hotel, Ronnie started thinking about Ben and Ass. It really seemed that things were moving in the right direction for them. Both of them seemed to be very happy. The chemistry was explosive. Tonight show was incredible and Ronnie was starting to think that Ben and Ass were responsible. It was true that Pete was an amazing guitar player and he did write all the songs. But the chemistry between those two was absolutely magical. Now that they were on the same plane it was even more intense.

“Wonder if that will ever happen to me.” Ronnie thought.

Continuing on that pattern of thought, Ronnie realized that it may have already happened but he chose to ignore it. And why, because she made a stupid mistake when she was seventeen? Everyone did dumb stuff when they were teenagers.

“Well, I guess it isn’t limited to your teens.” Ronnie said out loud.

It was Ronnie, after all, that had been a drug dealer up until six months ago. He and Schnieder had been responsible for putting a couple hundred pounds of weed on the street. And he was judging Annie for doing something ten years ago, that actually resulted in putting a total wack job behind bars.

“I’m a dumbass.” Ronnie said out loud once again.

Reaching into his pocket, Ronnie pulled out his cell phone. Dialing the numbers, he felt a small wave of nausea build in his stomach. It took a moment to make the connection, and then he heard the phone ring.

“Hello.” A sleepy voice said.

“Annie?” Ronnie asked as he glanced at his watch.

“Yeah…Ronnie?” Annie asked. “Is that you?”

Hesitating for a moment as he tried to think of what he was going to say.

“Yeah, it’s me.” He said tentatively. “What’s up?”

He flinched at saying something so inane.

“Uh…I’m sleeping.” She said. “Why are you calling me at … two o’clock in the morning? Actually, why are you calling me at all?”

“Oh…sorry…totally forgot about the time difference.” Ronnie said apologetically. “But I needed to talk to you and I couldn’t wait till morning.”

“What…is something wrong?” Annie asked the concern evident in her voice.

“Well, not really wrong.” Ronnie responded. “I just wanted to tell you that I realize what I jerk I have been. I shouldn’t have walked out on you like that and I am very sorry. Can we talk about it?"






<<< Chapter 21


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A weird calm

Ever since I posted Significant increase in traffic yesterday, it has been quiet out there - maybe too quiet.

I read a thing about bloggers and the thesis of the article is that if you are obsessive about things in general, you will be a good blogger. The reason is that "good" bloggers are the ones that continually tweak their templates, obsessively check your web logs for traffic reports, constantly write a publish and continually edit posts after the initial posts. Upon reading that, I leapt out of my chair, ran to the bathroom and took a long look.

"Who are you?" I screamed at my reflection. "How did you become this blogging ... t-t-thing?"

Three people immediately stopped what they were doing and left the restroom without even washing their hands - Philistines! Really, I mean to simply walk out of a restroom without washing your hands in this day and age. When the Washington State Department of Health has gone to all the trouble to post signs in all restaurant restrooms that "Hands must be washed for 20 seconds with warm soapy water." You would assume that in an office building the people would be a little more conscientious than that.

That's not important. Continuing the self-interrogation, I loudly questioned my own sanity very aggressively. Hearing the door open, I spun to determine the identity of the interloper. He immediately spun on his heal mumbling something about using the other restroom.

Whatever. I think I came upon something. Thinking back about the blogs I have been running over I have seen a familiar pattern. There is the beginning phase, where the blogs are very tentative, brief and full of self-consciousness. Then the explosion of posts as the writer is caught up in the whirlwind of ideas. It is as if the words are flying off their fingers at an incredibly manic pace. As the blog picks up speed and the comments increase, the blogging hits full force. Then the perceived pressure to provide content for the loyal readers begins to moment. The posts are a little tighter, more forced emotion. That usually coincidences with the first plateau in traffic. Suddenly, it's a crisis. Aching posts full of self-doubt. The needy - "Why aren't you reading me?" posts. Next, it is either the teary goodbye or the sudden ending of posts. Lastly, there is the return full of emotion and explanation of the soul search and the promises to try to start blogging again.

Trust me, I am not judging these individuals. I am merely making some observations. As a matter of fact, I have experienced each of the emotions I described above personally. Some I have shared, some I have not. I haven't made it to the self-imposed sabbatical yet, but it's probably just around the corner. Maybe not. One thing is for sure, if you jump into this blogging thing - check you sanity at the door and don't expect anyone to recognize who you are.


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Chapter 21 has arrived

I posted Chapter 21 last night. This morning a made a few minor edits. It is now available. That's my second chapter this week and we haven't even made to the weekend. I am in a groove with the story and I have been spending more time writing The Break than blogging anything. I'll continue to post chapters as I write them. Eventually, I may have to go back and revisit the order of the chapters. We'll see. I could post Chapter 22 either tomorrow night or Sunday. Check back!


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The Break - Chapter 21

Chapter 21

The signal changed to walk. The pair stepped of the curb and walked diagonally across the intersection. They turned left and walked to the west, the late afternoon sun glaring in their eyes. Being that both we long-term residents of the Denver metro area, they were prepared. Their squinting was quickly alleviated by sunglasses.

Ron stepped ahead of Anita and opened the door to the bar. He stepped back holding the door, made a sweeping gesture toward the door and allowed her to pass in front of him. Out of habit, he eyes immediately focused on her bottom.

“Nice ass.” He thought. “Really nice. With that rack and the face. She is quite a woman.

Suddenly, Ron remembered why he was meeting this woman. With some difficulty, he managed to push the sexual thoughts from his mind. This wasn't a trivial matter for Ron. Since he could remember, he had always done a quick inventory of every woman he met. But he was trying to change that. Finally, he had come to realize that people, especially women, were more than a sum of their parts.

“Two, please.” Anita said to the host. “A booth if you have one.”

“Yes, ma’am.” The host said. “This way please.”

The host turned and immediately began walking off at restaurant host pace that ensures that he will arrive at the table in time to turn back around and stare at you with the “Could you please move faster, I have things to do look”. The main objective of this look is to elicit a meek apology from the guest as they gratefully slide into the seat as if they had just been given the last seat on the last rocket off the planet just before the big meteor hits.

Instead of bolting across the empty restaurant to the farthest table, the host stopped only two steps ahead and turned back to the pair.

“Hey, didn’t you use to be Anita Sanchez.” He asked.

“Why yes I am Anita Sanchez.” Anita responded flattered to be recognized for the first time in what seemed to be an eternity. Even if it was a less than complimentary statement, it was nice to be acknowledged.

“I thought you left town, you cold-hearted bitch.” He said.

“Excuse me?” Ron asked forcefully.

“FUCK ME!” The host said noticing Ron for the first time. “They let you out of jail you mother fucker?”

The conversation caught the attention of the bartender. Quickly, he walked around the end of the bar.

“Yes, I have been released from jail.” Ron said calmly, even though he felt quite irratated. But he definitely did not want to escalate the situation.

“FUCK YOU!” The host replied. “Get out! Get out! GET OUT!

“Whoa, there Jeff.” The bartender said as he arrived on the scene. “What’s going on?

Completely pale and trembling, the host pointed at Anita and then at Ron. The bartender stared at the pair for a brief moment. Suddenly, the flash of recognition replaced his confusion with anger.

“The bomber and the bitch together?” He sneered. “He’s right, get the hell outta here before I lose my temper.”

Completely taken aback by the two pronged assault, Ron began backing to the door. As he left, he reached out to Anita and tugged her firmly. Never one to back from a fight, Anita looked over her shoulder pulled back. The second time, Ron pulled more insistently and nodded towards the men. Anita turned her head back and looked at the men. Never before had she seen such hatred up close, personal and directed towards her.

“I mean it, GET THE FUCK OUT!” The bartender screamed. “We had five friends at the Pepsi Center, you bastard. And you ... you ... ghoul.”

Ron scanned the bar, they had begun to attract attention. Several of the others seemed to pick up on who they were. Although he was a big man, Ron’s health issues had weakened him significantly. Additionally, he did not come here to fight a mob. However, he did have enough strength to manhandle someone Anita’s size and that is exactly what he did.

“You two deserve each other.” A voice called after them.

They covered the twenty-five feet to the door in less than five seconds. But Ron didn’t stop when they hit the sidewalk. As a matter of fact, he hustled Anita four blocks before he stopped and allowed Anita to catch her breath.

“Now that was interesting.” Anita said.

“I’m starting to get use to the looks.” Ron said. “But that was the first time I ever experienced anything like that.”

The two stood there for a moment looking at each other. Not really sure what to do since they had only know each other for about fifteen minutes.

“I understand why they were pissed at me, but why were they saying that about you?” The question flew out of Ron’s mouth involuntarily.

“You didn’t see it?” She asked in a surprised tone.

“See what?” Ron asked.

“Wow, I thought everyone had seen it.” Anita said. “Apparently, they even played it on national news.”

“Played what?” Ron asked getting a little impatient.

“My news cast the night of the explosion.” She said meekly.

Puzzled, Ron just stood there staring at her. Completely unaware that his gaze was causing her nervousness, it actually surprised him to see her fidgeting.

“Well, looks like neither one of us have a bunch of friends. In public anyway.” Anita offered. “So, I have an idea.”

“I’m listening.” Ron said.

“You probably should see the tape, so you understand why people are not thrilled to see me.” Anita explained. “I have a copy at my apartment. If we go look at it, then you can decide if you want me to be the person to tell your story.”

Ron paused for a moment, considering his alternatives. Anita was right. He didn’t have a whole lot of friends right now. It had been difficult for him to even find a lawyer. Having money definitely had helped in that regard. He was able to assemble a team from New York and California. Absolutely no one in Colorado would even consider taking his case. He needed some good press. Maybe this Anita was the person to do it.

“Sure, let’s take a look.” Ron said. “Live far from here?”

“Actually, my apartment is right there.” Anita said as she pointed to a building on the next block.

“How convenient.” Ron said with a smile.

Anita led Ron to her apartment. Once they arrived, Anita showed Ron to the living room and asked him to have a seat.

“Nitti?” Elena asked meekly as she opened her bedroom a crack and peered through with one eye.

“Yes, Lena.” Anita replied. “This is Ron Harrison.”

“Ron Harrison?” Elena responded her voice betrayed her mistrust. “What’s he doing here?”

“It’s okay, Lena.” Anita responded in a reassuring tone. “Really, it is.”

The eye looked Ron up and down. Although he did not actually see the motion, Ron knew that he crossed herself as she shut the door.

“That’s validating.” Ron said sarcastically.

“Don’t mind Lena.” Anita said. “She’s an old hen. She always has been. Even in high school, she acted like that when I brought boys home.”

“Oh, so I am a boy?” Ron asked in a cocky tone, that was just right mix of humor and flirtatiousness for the situation.

“Actually, she is probably more worried about that than the fact that you’re an accused criminal.” Anita said a touch more harshly than she meant to.

Both paused uncomfortably for a moment. Ron was a little self-conscious that his hunter instinct took over at the first opportunity to flirt with her. Anita was a little nervous that she would take her tone as a rebuff to his flirting.

“The tape?” Ron finally asked.

The two watched the tape from the painful start to the excruciating end without saying a word. Anita picked up the remote control and turned of the power on both the television and the VCR.

“Jeez, all I did was blow up a building.” Ron quipped after a moment of silence.

“Ouch, that’s going to leave a mark.” Anita responded good-naturedly.

Ron was happy to see that Anita had a sense of humor. Subtly, he had kept an eye on her while the watched the tape. He saw how she cringed every time her face came on the screen. Additionally, he saw how she was looking at him, trying to gauge his reaction. It was very pleasing to Ron that despite her unease, she did not respond defensively to his comment.

“Okay, so here’s the deal.” Ron said directly. “There was this guy named Schnieder that was like a roadie in my son’s band. But that was his nickname, his real name was Frankie. That’s the guy I shot. That’s the guy that planted the bomb.”

“Hang on. I need to get a tablet.” Anita said.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Abruptly, the song ended. The four boys ran off stage left. Ronnie was the first to arrive.

“Damn, dude.” Ronnie said to no one in particular. “Where’s Schnieder with our drinks?”

“Who cares, dude.” Pete said excitedly. “Did you see the titties on that girl in the front? Holy shit!”

“Yeah, I saw ‘em.” Ronnie replied. “She’s into you, totally.”

“Yeah, I need to get a pass.” Pete said as he walked quickly past Ronnie.

Ronnie looked over and saw Ass and Ben entwined in a very intimate hug. A warm glow overcame him. The adrenaline combined with the love he felt around him was all encompassing.

“Got it!” Pete said as he slapped Ronnie between the shoulder blades almost totally destroying the feeling.

“Dude” Ronnie yelled over the noise. “You gotta quit doing that.”

“Let’s rock, boys” Pete screamed at Ben and Ass jolting them out of their moment.

With the backstage pass clenched between his teeth, Pete ran to his guitar stand, picked up his guitar and flipped the strap. As Ben strapped on his base, Pete leaned down and handed the pass to the very pretty, well endowed girl at the front.

“And bring your friend.” He yelled.

They didn’t even wait for Ronnie to return. He’d be there when it was time. As soon as Ass sat down, he tapped the snare three times. That was the cue, Ben and Pete exploded into the encore. It was one of their favorites, actually their second favorite after Debbie. Ronnie was due in 10 bars. When the rest of the boys got there Ronnie’s guitar joined the fray. For three solid minutes, Pete and Ronnie played off each other. It was a raw, powerful sound that gave of an almost sexually vibe. The rhythm was strong, driving and tight.

Then it stopped – no lights, no sound. The crowd went wild, after fifteen seconds they went nuts. The frenzy erupted when they kicked in and the lights came up again at the twenty second mark.

They played the rest of the song to a crowd that never wanted it to end. Sweaty bodies slammed into each other with force. No matter what security tried to do, this mosh was not going to slow down. Not with the way the boys were playing. The energy continued to grow. Feeling it, they didn’t stop at the end of the song. It just ran into the next song.

Caught up in the best performance they had ever delivered, they continued to play for forty-five minutes. Song after song, some how each one surpassed the previous in both feeling and intensity. Finally, Ronnie looked out at the crowd and saw that they were as tired as he was. He turned and walked towards stage left. Three staccato cymbal crashes and they all got up and followed Ronnie off stage.

Looking around, Ronnie still didn’t see Schnieder.

“Where the fuck is Schnieder?” Ronnie asked.

As the local boys walked out to start breaking down, one of them stopped in front of Ronnie.

“Dude, I’ve never seen anything like that.” He said. “You guys were laying it down.”

“Thanks, man.” Ronnie replied.

Ronnie was beginning to get a little worried about Schnieder. It was one thing for him to be gone right when they walked off stage. There was no timeline for Schnieder to get the itch for a smoke. But he was never gone for more than two or three minutes. Deciding to look for him, he was going to tell the guys.

Looking over, he saw Ben and Ass fully engaged in a conversation. The girl from the front row bounded across the back stage area and squeezed her ample breasts against Pete. Looked like it was up to him.

Ronnie walked around the whole backstage area. Not finding him there, Ronnie went to the service entrance. Opening the door, Ronnie thought he heard someone moaning. Stepping into the alley, he definitely heard someone in pain. Quickly, he walked around the dumpster and saw Schnieder lying curled up in a ball.

“Schnieder, dude.” Ronnie said nervously. “What the fuck happened.”

“Uhhhhhh……”

“Dude, come on.” Ronnie said as he reached out and put a hand one Schnieder’s back. “Are you hurt?”

“It’s the evil, man.” He replied weakly. “I seen it.”

Dumbfounded, Ronnie was sure how to react. This was exactly like the last time. But then he just let it go and neither had mentioned it again. Ronnie wasn’t sure if this was some kind of flashback or what.

“Can you sit up?” Ronnie asked.

“I-I-I…think so.” He said

Ronnie helped Schnieder up and let him lean against the brick wall behind him. Seeing the fear in his eyes really worried Ronnie. He hadn’t ever seen that look before. Suddenly, the fear was gone. Schnieder looked completely normal.

“Man, what’s going on?” Schnieder asked Ronnie as if it was the first time he had seen him.

“Schnieder, you’re in the alley.” Ronnie explained. “You told me you saw the evil.”

“The what?” He responded.

“You know, the evil.” Ronnie tried once again.

“I have no idea what you are talking about.” Schnieder said. “Show over?”

Ronnie just stared at him.

“Show over?” He repeated.

“Yeah, it is.” Ronnie told him as he shook his head.

“Guess I better get to work.” Schnieder said. “Help me up.”

Reaching out, Ronnie grasped Schnieder’s hand. Leaning backward, he used his body weight to pull Schnieder to his feet.

“Let’s go, boy.” Schnieder said as he walked past Ronnie.

Walking through the service door, Schnieder headed toward the stage and began helping the local guys tear down the equipment. Ronnie marveled as he set about working as if nothing had happened.






<<< Chapter 20


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

Significant increase in traffic

It certainly appears as if I am getting more traffic. Two weeks ago, I told you that I had a milestone of the 1000th page load. It took five weeks to achieve the milestone. That's the first 35 days that I had been blogging. In the 14 days since that post, there have been 922 page loads. So, thank you for reading and thank you for returning.


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

Chapter 20 is available for your viewing pleasure

Chapter 20 of The Break is now available for your reading pleasure. Things are about to get very interesting for the boys in the band.

As you may notice, I tweaked the site a little. I changed it around a bit for easier navigation. Also, I added a brief desciption under each of the links so that you would be able to tell what each of the sites are about.

Additionally, I updated each of the chapters listed in The Break Archive with a link to the previous chapter and to the next chapter. So now if you start at Chapter 1, you can easily navigate to the next chapter with one click. You can navigate from Chapter 1 through Chapter 20 without back tracking at all. Let me know what you think of the new navigation.


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

The Break - Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Finally, she was all prepared. After her last check of everything, she was convinced that it was all set. She could do this. Now, she was ready. Walking over to the door, she grabbed the handle and pulled it as quickly as she could and leaned forward. The edge of the door struck her just below the eye. Involuntarily she let out a shriek as she felt the sting of the wood bite into her cheek. Within a brief moment, the blood began to trickle down her face. Quickly, she walked through the doorway and across the hall. She entered the other bedroom and leaned forward. As she did so, a few drops of blood dripped onto the shirt that was hanging on the hanger. She was careful not to allow too much blood to get on the shirt.

Once she was satisfied with her work, she leaned her head back and pressed a tissue to her eye. Then she pick up the shirt and threw it into the hamper. Moving as fast as she could, she returned to her bed and removed the tissue. The blood was flowing too slowly from her cheek so she stabbed at it with her fingernail. That was sufficient to get the blood flowing again. Then she picked up the Dixie cup and dripped the contents her left and then her right eye. Screaming in pain, she laid her head back on her pillow. It took all her efforts to keep from touching the wound on her face or rubbing her eyes. It was completely miserable. Her eyes were burning and the wound was throbbing as the swelling increased. To keep her mind occupied, she thought about the look she would see on his face.

After ten minutes, she got up and walked into the bathroom. She carried with her the cup that contained the jalapeno pepper juice and the tissue she had used to prevent the blood from dripping onto the floor and tossed them into the toilet. Finally, she picked up the condom and the wrapper that she left on the counter and threw them in the toilet as well. Finally, she flushed.

Her eyes still watering and snot running out of her nose, she walked to the telephone and called 911.

“911 operator, what is your emergency.” The woman’s voice said.

“…he…” she started.

“911 operator, what is your emergency.” The woman repeated.

“He…raped…me…” she sobbed.

“Who raped you?” The woman began.

“My step-dad.” She replied.

“What’s your name?” The woman asked?

“Annie…Morris.” Annie replied. “Can you come get me?”

Dutifully, the operator obtained all the required information. Within eleven minutes, the paramedics and police arrived at the scene. The paramedics treated Annie’s facial wounds. The self-inflicted one on the left side of her face and the one she sustained the night before when Tony had rebuffed her attempted seduction. Convincingly, she sobbed the entire time. Real tears flowing freely.

Finally, the prepped her and transported her to the hospital. As they left, she saw one of the officers coming down the stairs with Tony’s bloodstained shirt. If they looked, they would find his underwear with her DNA on it as well since she rubbed them on herself prior to slamming to door into her face. Yes, she had set up a pretty convincing crime scene.

At the hospital, they did a rape kit and found five of Tony’s pubic hairs to go with the seven or eight from Annie’s bed. Additionally, they found spermicidal gel that would match the package of condoms in Tony’s nightstand. It looked as if this was an open and shut case.

“So, looks like the step-dad is good for this, huh?” The detective asked.

“I’d have to agree, if there was a ‘this’.” The nurse replied.

“Come again.” The shocked detective asked.

“Well, everything about this points to a rape except …” The nurse explained.

“Except what?” The detective asked impatiently.

“Except …” The nurse continued as she looked at the officer over her half-moon glasses. “No vaginal bruising and an intact hymen.”

“What the …” The detective started.

“Looks like we have a girl that has something against her step-dad.”

They called Annie’s mother who rushed back to be by her daughter’s side. After talking to Tony, the police and Annie, she was perplexed. She wanted to believe her daughter but the fact that there was no physical bruising and her hymen was still intact, she didn’t know what to believe.

“Honey.” Annie said. “Are you okay?”

“Not really, Mom.” Annie said. “I can’t believe Tony did this to me…to us.”

“Annie.” Her mother asked tenderly. “Are you sure that this happened the way you think it did?”

“MOM!!!” Annie started.

But her protest was interrupted by a sharp knock on the door. Without waiting for a response, the door swung open and the detective walked in quickly.

“Well, it turns out your daughter is a very lucky girl.” He said.

“Excuse me.” Annie’s mother responded.

“Well, when we ran your husband’s DNA on this case.” The detective explained. “We got hits on five open cases.”

“R-r-r-apes?” Annie’s mother asked as she began to twist her hair in knots.

“Yes, well…actually, rapes and murders?” The detective said as gently as you can deliver that type of news.

“WHAT?” Both women shrieked simultaneously.

“We have arrested you husband on six counts of rape and five counts of homicide.” The detective continued to direct his remarks to Annie’s mother. “Like I said.” He continued as he turned his attention to Annie. “You were a very lucky girl. All the victims were teenage girls.”

The sobs emitting from Annie were real this time. She was joined by her mother and they didn’t stop crying for a very long time. Actually, it seemed as if they cried for the entire trial. Only for Annie, even after the trial she couldn’t quit crying. That was the first time she was checked in to facility.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

The divider opened slowly, Ronnie poked his head through the opening. He saw both Ben and Ass standing in the aisle. It was very obvious that Ass was aroused.

“Uh…not…ta…interrupting anything am I?” Ron asked tentatively. “Just heard some yelling and wanted to make sure you guys were okay. So…it…ta…looks like you guys got everything under control and you don’t really need me to keep standing here yammering on and on. So…sorry…go ahead and …I mean…just forget that…I …uh …shit.”

Ronnie shut the divider and spun on his heel. Both the others released a little quip of nervous laughter.

“You think he was flustered enough?” Ben asked.

“He sounded about as freaked out as me.” Ass responded.

Ben began laughing in earnest. The farcical nature of the current series of events could not be denied. Ass turned and looked at Ben and at first was surprised to see him laughing. Then he got it and he joined his friend. The embraced in a warm hug, patted each other on the back and separated.

“It’s just too soon.” Ass said unnecessarily. “You know.”

“Yeah.” Ben said with a smile. “It takes a little longer than 5 hours to get use to this.”

“No doubt dude.” Ass agreed. “Wanna join the others?”

The two walked up front. The other two saw the smiles on their faces and returned the smiles.

“How you two make out?” Pete asked with a smirk.

“Pretty good, lots of tongue.” Ass responded.

Completely taken aback the other four burst out laughing, full belly laughs that only come out when share with the closest of company. Schnieder swerved slightly as he wiped the tears from his eyes, causing a near rectal discharge from the driver of the Geo Metro that was attempting to pass the bus.

For the rest of the trip to Spokane, the five talked about the gig. They worked out the order of the songs. Additionally, they worked on Ronnie’s between song riff. He was very uncomfortable doing it, but he was getting much better. The crowds seemed to respond better than when the just played uninterrupted sets.

Schnieder pulled up to the service entrance of the Big Easy. They emptied the bus and began the long process of setting up the equipment. Once everything was set up, they tested the lights and then it was time for the sound check.

“Hey, were recording this right?” Ronnie asked.

“Yeah.” Schnieder responded.

“Let’s play “Debbie” all the way through.” He said as he began the tuning that started the song.

The four erupted as one. It was an intense sound that flowed out of the quartet.

“Fuck yeah.” Ronnie screamed into the mike.

“Fuck yeah.” Pete joined in perfect synchronization as he sang it for the second time.

Ben and Ass weren’t looking at each other, but they were tighter than they had ever been in the past. Finally, they turned to each other as if they knew the other would be looking. Their eyes met and they were in the groove. Tonight was going to be great.

After the song, they broke for dinner. Then it was showtime. They heard the announcer say their name, Ronnie puked into the trash can and they ran out on stage. Schnieder watched from the wings. They had been traveling together for almost a year now and he had never heard them sound like this. It was magical. The music was free flowing, tight and nasty. After several songs, Schnieder felt a familiar itch.

Usually, there would be cigarette smoke to cover the smell of a joint, but this town seemed to be smoke-free. Schnieder walked out the service entrance. As he walked to the dumpster, he extracted a joint and lit it. He inhaled deeply and felt the smoke expand in his lungs. Exhaling, he mused about the boys. They’re going to make it.

“Hey Frankie.” The voice said as Schnieder felt a strong hand grasp his shoulder and spin him around.

“What the …holy shit…” Schnieder attempted. “YOU!”

“That’s right soldier.” Ian said. “It is me.”

“What are you doing here?” He managed as he felt his knees going weak. “What do you want?”

“Gotta job for you Frankie-boy.” Ian explained. “It’s a class-one operation – top priority. Operation active.”

“Yes, sir.” Schnieder replied crisply as he snapped to attention all signs of fatigue and nervousness disappearing.

“Excellent soldier.” Ian said. “And you have stayed in tip-top shape. Excellent.”

“Yes, sir.” He responded as a remained rigidly at attention.

Ian walked around Schnieder inspecting him. To an untrained eye, Schnieder appeared to be your run-of-the-mill hippie. But what Ian saw truly pleased him. His clothes were as neat as any soldiers and he was armed to the teeth. Without actually seeing them, Ian noticed three separate handguns. There was a .32 caliber tucked into his right boot, a 9mm Glock in a underarm holster, and another 9mm in tucked in the back of his pants. In his left boot, he had an eight inch knife. Lastly, he had a five inch switchblade in the left internal pocket of his coat.

Ian could tell because he had a trained eye. But he also knew because that was how he instructed his men to arm themselves.

“Excellent Soldier, excellent.” Ian said as he nodded his head in approval.

Schnieder felt the pride swell inside him. He had passed his first surprise inspection. His superior was pleased. It was very important to please this man.

“Stay alert.” Ian said. “From now on we are a go. Stand by for further instructions. I will be in contact.”

“Yes, sir.” Schnieder said as he saluted Ian.

Ian returned the salute and then vanished. As soon as Ian left, Schnieder burst into tears, fell to the ground and wrapped himself in the fetal position.

“The evil, man. The evil.” He repeated through his sobs as he rocked himself back and forth.


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

Who wants to see me on David Lettermen

Here's my call to action for all you loyal readers out there. I started watching David Lettermen in 1980 - I think - might have been 1981. I was a loyal watcher all through the eighties and most of the nineties, but then I got old, got a real job and started going to bed early. Anyway, I have always wanted to be on Dave's show. I think he is a genius and I would love to meet him.

Do me a favor, would ya? Follow this link Late Show Feedback to the show's feedback form and ask, no demand, that Dave have me on the show. You know I've already written to him twice. I am sure that a focused email campaign is sure to get me an invite. What else do you have to do? You're here reading my blog, that tells me you have some free time on your hands. Imagine, you could be a part of getting me on nationally broadcast TV show. Think of the story you could tell you family and friends. "Uh...I helped get this guy on TV once." They'll be riveted, hanging on your every word.

Here, I'll even give you the text to copy and paste right into the little box:

Yo Dave!

The Rebeleyeball, sometimes know as Paul Gavin, is the best darn blogger at Misadventures of a 42-year old writer wannabe. I think he's a hoot. Gotta see him on your show, Dave - gotta. Hey, I even hear he's an ex-Hoosier just like you and Bobby Knight. Now that would be a show, Dave, Bobby and Paul - an ex-Hoosier reunion show.

Be cool to The Rebeleyeball. Trust me, your ratings will barely even move.

Late,

insert your name here

See, it'll be easy. You can do it. Or if you prefer, you can type in your own request. The more bizarre, the better - just make sure you reference The Rebeleyeball or Paul Gavin. Here's a chance to use a little of that creativity you have lingering around unused. It would be especially cool if there was a big response from people outside the States.


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Updated Chapter 19

I just couldn't live with the fact that Chapter 19 didn't have the same organization as the other chapters. So, I wrote up the second half of Chapter 19. If you have already read Chapter 19, just go to the dotted line and start reading about Annie.

If you haven't read Chapter 19, then this message doesn't mean anything to you so disregard it. But please feel free to read and enjoy Chapter 19.


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

Chapter 19 is available for your viewing pleasure

Unlike the previous chapters, you may notice that Chapter 19 only has one story. Mainly because I wanted to stick to the two chapter a week pace and that's all I could write yesterday. I cannot believe how crappy I have felt for the last 3 days.

Anyway, I hope you like Chapter 19. I think I came pretty close to one possibility of what it must be like to be in the situation Ass finds himself. Having never been in that situation myself, I really don't know. Anyone care to comment?

If you can't tell, I really like these 4 characters, the guys in the band. I hope that I am accurately capturing the bond that they share. Still, there is quite a bit of work for me to really paint the picture of what they mean to each other.

In Chapter 20, we'll get to see "the evil" once again. Also, Anita and Ron will have there first conversation. Check back on Wednesday.


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

The Break - Chapter 19

Chapter 19

As they made their way to the back of the bus, Ass turned and shut the flimsy divider. When he turned back around Ben was already sitting on one of the four beds that where set up in the back of the bus. It was a very nice setup. It was a little too close quarters for the band to use on a regular basis, but it served well for the long road trips or on nights when they couldn’t or didn’t want to find a hotel.

Ass paused and observed his friend. Ben was busy picking at the lint on his shirt. Attempting to move, Ass found his feet were fixed to the floor of the bus. Panic gripped him like a bear trap. Unable to move, he just stood by the divider.

“Something wrong?” Ben asked when he finally looked up and saw his ashen faced friend.

“Uh…uh…” Ass tried. “I guess I don’t know where to start.”

Shifting he wait uncomfortably, Ass could still not find the inner strength to propel himself forward. Forward, towards Ben. Forward, towards completely changing his life.

“Since I’ve been dealing with this for a while,” Ben said. “Why don’t I start?”

“Sure…okay.” Ass agreed.

“Why don’t you come and sit next to me?” Ben asked softly.

Once again, Ass shifted his wait uncomfortably. But he did not budge from the spot. It was as if he was standing on the ledge of a skyscraper waiting to jump. Still unconvinced that he had though this whole thing through, he reached back and touched the divider as if it was the connection to his past life.

Standing in this doorway kept him safe, both in reality and metaphorically. If he just stayed here, he could still turn and walk back to his old life. But if he went forward, everything would be changed forever. If he and Ben worked it out, then he would live his life as gay man.

“Are you a queer, Eddie?” His own voice taunted him in his head. “Is that why they call you ‘Ass’? Are you a FAG?”

His breath quickening, Ass felt his knees going weak. His legs began to shudder uncontrollably. Sweat exploded from every pore in his body. Almost instantly, it began to show on his clothes. He felt bile rising in his throat. With concentration and discipline, he was able to choke it back down. Deciding that throwing up might send the wrong message to Ben.

Ben noticed the sudden physical reaction that had transformed his friend into a trembling wreck. Concern swept over him. Quickly, he stood up to give Eddie the support he appeared to need.

But in the moment it took him to standup, Ass had a vision appear before him. It was Pete. More like a disembodied close up of Pete’s face floating in front of his face, excluding all else from his sight.

“So, you guys packing the fudge, or what?” Hovering Pete’s face asked him.

Ass saw what he missed just an hour or so ago when Pete said that. Although it was a terribly crass remark, Pete actually said it with the love that these four shared between them. When Ronnie repeated it, he remembered seeing the same look in his eyes.

They were a team and that is made them good. They were a team because they all felt something for each other. What made them a great team was the fact that they would support each other without judgment.

“I have a shot at true happiness.” He thought again, just as he thought while he was running. “And I have the support of all the people that matter to me.”

“Eddie, are you all right?” Ben’s voice penetrated through to Ass.

“Uh…yeah.” Ass managed. “Whew, guess you can’t just go out and run 20 plus miles and expect not to pay for it.”

Wiping his brow, Ass stumbled forward.

“Think I need to sit down.” Ass said as he fell forward on to the bed across from the one that had been previously occupied by Ben.

“Can I get you anything?” Ben asked.

“Water.” Ass managed without moving from his prone position, face buried in the pillow. “And a towel.”

Ben went back to the front and retrieved three waters from the refrigerator unnoticed by the other three that appear to be fully engaged in a conversation of their own.

Walking back, he closed the divider behind him. Ass had rolled over and it appeared that the color was returning to his face. When he saw Ben, he propped himself up on his elbow.

“Here you go.” Ben said as he handed Ass the water. Then he went to fetch a towel form the bathroom. When he returned, he flipped the towel to Ass and started to sit down on the bed he had occupied prior to Ass’ little episode.

“Sit here.” Ass said as he patted his bed.

Quickly, Ass sat up and made room for Ben. After quickly wiping his forehead, he twisted the lid off of his water and took a long drink. Ben sat down next to Ass, but not too close. The timing of Ass little fit of tremors, left him feeling unconvinced that he friend was ready for this.

“Holy shit.” Ass exclaimed. “That was intense. I thought I was going down. Remember when that happened to me after that triathlon? Had to go get the IVs and shit.”

“Not quite sure this is exactly the same as that.” Ben said somewhat discouraged.

“Of course it isn’t.” Ass replied. “That was merely physical. I am use to physically exhausting myself. I am not use to having life changing conversations.”

Ben was completely taken aback by his honesty. In the eight minutes that had elapsed since he noticed the tremors in Ass’ legs, Ben had been busy convincing himself that Ass was going to devastate him. Tell him that although he loved him, he couldn’t see their relationship going that direction.

“You mean, it wasn’t just from the running?” Ben asked.

“Well, that certainly didn’t help.” Ass continued.

“So?” Ben prodded.

“Well, I was just standing there thinking if I go sit with you our entire world is suddenly different.”

“You’re afraid?” Ben asked.

“Don’t know if it’s fear.” Ass responded. “I just kept thinking that it felt like I was standing on a ledge convinced I was going to jump off, but …”

Ass vigorously wiped the sweat from his brow and rubbed the towel on his head. Setting the towel on the bed, he turned back to Ben.

“Oh, sorry.” He apologized. “Just had to do a quick wiped down.”

“But what?” Ben asked.

“Well, if you really think about it, I’ve already jumped.” Ass stated matter-of-factly. “The minute I told you how I felt.”

“Yeah, but you could change your mind.” Ben managed tentatively.

Ass threw his head back against the bus, exasperated. Sitting that way, looking up and the ceiling of the bus.

“You were completely right.” Ass said. “Think about it. Remember in high school, when I always went after the girls? Same in college, just a wider variety.”

“Yeah.” Ben said jealously. “You talked about it non-stop.”

“Don’t you think it’s a little strange that I haven’t had sex with anyone in over two years?” Ass said. “I mean you DID bring it up.”

“Well, yeah.” Ben agreed timidly.

“Well, that’s one of the main things I thought about when I was running.” Ass explained. “I couldn’t come up with any other answer.”

“Other than what?” Ben asked.

“That I get all I need from you.” Ass said sincerely. “You and I are already in a relationship and I get exactly what I need from it. Hang on a sec.”

Ass stood up and peeled off his sweat soaked shirt. Ben sat staring at Ass, not really believing that the conversation was going this way. He thought he would have to convince Ass. Coax him into feeling as he felt. All it took was one conversation. A spontaneously conversation at that.

Ass retrieved a new t-shirt and pulled it over his head. He had interrupted the conversation for a couple of reasons. First, he really was uncomfortable in the shirt. Second, was to burn off a little of the excess nervous energy he was feeling. Lastly, as the last breath before he dove off the edge. When he was dressed and mentally prepared, he sat down next to Ben and took his hands tenderly. He gazed into his eyes.

“Look in my eyes.” Ass said as he felt a familiar tinge in his groin. “What do you see?”

“I see it.” Ben replied sharing the moment.

“You can do this.” Ass said to himself. “You WANT to do this.

“And so do I.” He said as he leaned forward and kissed Ben fully on the lips.

Ass felt the incredible softness of Ben’s lips as he continued kissing him vigorously. As Ben’s lips parted, Ass slipped his tongue into his mouth. It was met by Ben greedily sucking his tongue. The little twinge in his groin some became a tremendous throbbing. Gently, Ass reached up and began stroking Ben’s long hair. Ben responded with a low moan. This spurred Ass on to be more aggressive in his kissing and in his treatment of Ben’s hair as he began to pull on it firmly.

Completely immersed in moment, both men gained momentum of both kissing and in moans of approval. Ass felt a tingle run down his spine and settle in the area between his ass and his testicles as Ben’s hand reached up his shirt and began to pinch his nipple. Thoroughly enjoying the feeling, Ass opened his eyes for the first time since they had started kissing well over ten minutes ago. He was greeted by the vision of Ben staring back lovingly.

Ass leapt off the bed as if it were well preheated skillet. As he stood, he pushed Ben away.

“OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!” he said involuntarily. “Oh my God...oh my God.”

“What?” Ben asked.

“What, what?” Ass replied.

“What’s wrong?” Ben asked. “It’s pretty obvious that you are enjoying yourself.

Ass followed Ben’s gaze to the very obvious erection in his pants. Although he had stopped the sexual activity, it continued to throb as it rarely had ever done before.

“EXACTLY!!!!”
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Despite the all encompassing depression, Annie was getting ready for work. She couldn’t afford to miss any more shifts. In the week since Ronnie left, walked out, she had missed two shifts. One more and they would fire her for sure. But there was even more at stake than her job. Her mental health was at risk. Based on what she learned from her two previous experiences, she knew if she didn’t maintain human contact the risk of losing it was increased.

Despite her past, Annie tried to present her life as perfect to the outside observer. Annie wouldn’t have it any other way. She strove for perfection in everything she did. But it was an illusion. Annie was not perfect. She had a terrible secret. But she would never tell anyone that – ever. She couldn’t.

Finally for the first time in her life, she had met someone that she trusted enough to tell her horrible secret to and what happened? He walked out without saying a word. Nothing. Complete silence.

This time it was going to be different. Annie was not going to give in to the depression and anxiety. She was not going to be institutionalized for a third time. She had worked too hard with her therapist. She was the one that convinced Annie that if she was going to have a relationship with someone, she was going to have to be truthful about her past.

Maybe she hadn’t waited long enough to tell Ronnie. But he deserved an explanation to her reaction to the first time they made love. People don’t usually burst into tears immediately upon completion of sex which is what she did when she and Ronnie had finished that night. She felt it was time. It was time to tell the whole truth. She started in reverse order because it was easier to tell it that way.

When Annie was a senior in college, she had a plan. Early in her college career, she met Branton Stokes, IV. Branton was from a very wealthy family. He was just the kind of boy Annie’s mother wanted her to marry. He was perfect. Naturally, they went through the promise, pre-engagement, engagement progression without having sex. The perfection was complete when they scheduled the June wedding and the European honeymoon.

One week before the wedding, Annie just fell apart. She began weeping uncontrollably for hours at a time. After several days of this behavior, her roommate took her to the hospital. They held her for a 72 hour psychiatric evaluation. At the end of that period, the doctors checked her in to a long-term care facility for six months.

Even without the benefit of an explanation of the crisis, Branton waited patiently for the time to elapse. Knowing that he loved Annie, he was sure they could work out whatever issues confronted them. Two weeks before her scheduled release, the doctors told him that they were not going to release Annie for another six months. Since Annie would not include him in her recovery or even allow anyone to tell Branton the extent or cause of her problems, he decided it was time for him to find a new Mrs. Branton Stokes, IV. The decision was made with the full support and counsel of his parents.

Although she did not want to involve Branton, Annie was making excellent progress on the real issue. Her father had been killed during Desert Storm when she was just eleven years old. One of those clean little conflicts where there are very few casualties. No big deal to anyone except the families directly affected. Her father’s death devastated her mother and almost destroyed Annie. She had always been Daddy’s little girl.

Four years later, Annie’s mom met Tony. It was a whirlwind romance and not just for Annie’s Mom. Annie was totally smitten with Tony as well. He was wonderful and he paid special attention to his new stepdaughter. In addition, he was a great provider. He was the owner of a local restaurant chain.

Annie was beautiful at fifteen and by her seventeenth birthday she had blossomed into a gorgeous young woman. Despite this, she didn’t have a boyfriend. The primary reason being, she was completely in love with Tony. Since the first moment she saw him she knew the depth of her feelings. For this reason, Annie began flirting with him constantly with the desired effect. She knew he felt the same way about her just by the way he looked at her.

Just a couple of months before Annie’s eighteenth birthday, Annie’s mother delivered the bad news.

“Annie, honey.” Her Mom started. “Your grandmother is sick. She needs to have an operation. Since she can’t be alone, I am going to go stay with her for a month or so. I have made arrangements at work, but I want to know how you feel about me leaving you here with Tony.”

Annie was shocked. Tony had been living with them for over two years. She had been infatuated with him for almost the entire time and now her mother was telling her that she would get to be alone with him for at least a month.

“A whole month?” Annie replied trying to hide her excitement. “I…I …guess that’d be okay.”

Her mother studied Annie, trying to determine if her daughter was really okay with staying behind or if she was just putting on a brave face.

“You sure it’s okay, honey?” Her Mom pressed. “I could just go up for the operation and come back.”

“No, I don’t mind.” Annie replied as the wicked thoughts raced through her head. “Grammy needs you. You should be there for her.”

“Well, if you’re sure…” Her Mom said tentatively. “I am leaving on Thursday.”

“Yes, I am sure.” Annie responded as she tried to figure out how she would be able to contain her excitement for the next two days.

Her mom left at nine o’clock Thursday morning. Annie had spent the last two days developing a scheme to get Tony to notice her. She had the perfect plan, but it would have to wait until tomorrow night. Right after dinner. That way, she would have the entire weekend with him.

The following night, Annie set her plan in action. She began by cooking Tony’s favorite meal, lasagna. Then she set a marvelous table with her mother’s china and candles. The arrangements for the evening extended to the bedroom. Candles on the nightstand and rose petals on the bed. Annie had also purchased a very nice piece of black lingerie.

When he walked in, Tony was taken completely by surprise. At first, he just thought Annie was being nice. But when Annie poured him a glass of wine, she made such an obvious attempt to make sure that he had an unobstructed view of her cleavage that her intentions became clear.

“So, what’s going on Annie?” Tony asked.

“Just some dinner.” She said coyly.

“C’mon Annie.” Tony said.

“Tony, you know how I feel about you.” She said. “I know you do and you feel the same about me.”

“How I feel about you is that you are my step-daughter.” Tony replied.

Annie was totally stunned. She knew how he felt. For the last five years she had noticed how he looked at her. He flirted with her almost as much as she flirted with him.

“Tony, how can you say that?” Annie replied hurtfully. “I know how you feel about me as a woman. I know you want me.”

“I want you as my step-daughter.” Tony replied in a firm and fatherly tone.

“I can’t believe you are saying this.” Annie cried out, tears streamed down her face. “I had this all planned for us and you are ruining it.

With that, Annie got up from the table and ran to her room. Tension was heavy for the next three and a half weeks between the two. Annie made a few false apologies that ended with her attempts at seduction being rebuffed by Tony.

Things came to a head five days before her mother was scheduled to return. Annie made another attempt at Tony. This time his patience had worn out. He had been fending off her onslaught for too long. Instead of a verbal rebuke, Tony pushed her to the floor. When she stood up, Tony backhanded Annie across the face – hard.

“This is the last time I am going to tell you to leave me the fuck alone.” Tony said harshly. “Do it again and I am telling your mother – got it.”

Then an idea came to Annie. She wasn’t sure how she thought of it. Maybe from one of the crime TV shows. Where ever it came from it was a bad idea, but she decided to do it.


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

Friday, March 03, 2006

Eighteen Chapters so far

The Break is moving along nicely, I think. Chapter 17 and Chapter 18 are the first two that I wrote from scratch. I realized that I haven't told you anything about this book.

I started writing this book in August of 2001. Originally, the bomber's motivation for blowing up the Pepsi Center was that he was very upset with the U.S. Federal Government. It was the bomber's opinion that Timothy McVeigh got a raw deal and since it happened in Denver, then the people in Denver had to pay.

I made pretty good progress on The Break up until September 11. For a while, I couldn't write much of anything. The one thing I did at that time was change the motivation of the bomber and I created the idea of "the evil" Then I just lost interest. For a while, I started another project that is a fictional story based on my own life. But I just didn't feel it.

What I did write was some introspective poetry that is very personal. I shared one of the poems The Kiss. Personally, I think this is the best one I wrote. Since I threw out my best and didn't get any comments, I decided that the rest will remain on my computer.

Now that I am writing full force again, I have changed a few things in the story. But it hasn't been significant. One of the things about reading a work in progress is that I am trying to get the story out as fast as I can. You may have noticed that I haven't spent much time editing. Additionally, as I am working I get off on some tangents and I change story details. For instance, In Chapter 17 when Schnieder asked for a beer while he was driving, Pete told him to "Fuck Off". But when I was writing Chapter 18, I remembered that Ronnie had decided to stop drinking and smoking pot. To make it seem a little more real, I wanted to put an O'Douls in his hand. Once I made that addition, I thought I would have Pete offer Schnieder an O'Douls. That way, I could fit in all the comments I hear when I offer one of my friends an O'Douls.


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Barely managed to finish Chapter 18

It is quite possible that I am dying. Well, that may be a slight exaggeration - I just have the flu. How could they possibly name such a devastating illness with three insignificant letters f-l-u. I know, it's actually influenza. That in itself is woefully inadequate. It should be something like the "my body hurts so bad I would gladly accept death to make it stop".

"Sorry, boss I can't come into work today. I have a nasty case of 'my body hurts so bad I would gladly accept death to make it stop'".

"Oh, well then stay home and get well. I don't want to catch that."


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

The Break - Chapter 18

Chapter 18

In the two weeks since her sister’s arrival, Anita was able to great strides regaining her energetic personality. After the cathartic release she experienced crying on her sister’s shoulder, they began to get Anita’s affairs in order. Together they thoroughly cleaned her apartment and paid all of her past due bills. For the first time in months, Anita dared to venture outside the confines of her apartment.

As she stepped out the door on to the sidewalk walk, she inhaled deeply. The crisp winter air stung her lungs, but it felt good. Actually, it felt fantastic. It was as if her sister’s presence brought a rebirth. Once again she felt alive. A smile formed on her face.

“You look good, Nitti.” Elena said. “Much better than the last couple of days.”

“Oh, Lena.” Anita replied. “I am so much better. I actually feel alive again.”

“That’s good…good.” Her older sister said reassuringly as she placed her hand on Anita’s arm. “Let’s go get some lunch.

The pair walked the four blocks to the restaurant side-by-side with their arms linked. Neither spoke the entire time. Anita feeling the effects of having her senses reawakened. Elena had something else on her mind.

“Table for two?” The hostess asked.

“Yes, please.” Anita replied. “Can we have a booth by the window?”

“I think I can do that for you.”

The hostess lead the sisters to a booth that looked out on to the street. She waited while they removed their coats and sat down. Then the hostess placed the menu in front of them.

“Our lunch special today is a hazelnut crusted Mahi Mahi and our soup is a sweet tomato basil. Can I bring you a cocktail or something else to drink?”

“I’ll have a Diet Coke.” Said Anita.

“Me, too.” Elena agreed.

“Your server today will be Chad.” The hostess continued with her saccharine sweet restaurant hostess voice.

Anita recognized the tone. It was very similar to her on-air voice. A flood of memories rushed over her and she felt a pang of sadness. Unconisiously, she felt sorry for herself pity. But she was not going to indulge the self pity. Not today. Enough was enough it was time to move past it. Having checked the inclination to sink down into depression, she turned her head slightly and looked into her sister’s eyes. For the first time since Elena came to her rescue, Anita noticed the pained look on her face.

“Lena?” Anita said. “Are you okay?”

“Oh, yes Nitti.” She replied unconvincingly.

“You always were a terrible liar.” Anita said. “What’s wrong.”

Her sister looked down at her hands in her lap and suddenly her shoulders began shaking as soundless tears became to run from her eyes.

“What is it?” Anita asked as she reached out and put her hand on top of her sister’s.

“It’s Jorge.” She wept.

Before Anita could say anything, she was interrupted by a very annoying overly friendly voice.

“Hi there. I’m Chad.” The voice said. “Have you ladies had a chance to look at the menu or do you need a few more minutes.”

“I think we need some time, please.” Anita said a little too briskly.

The waiter gave her the standard “what a bitch” stare that has been perfected by wait staff since the first café opened on the banks of the Tigris River. He walked away determined to give them the level of service they deserved.

“What’s with Jorge?” Anita asked. “Is he sick?”

“No, the bastard is not sick.” Elena said. “He ran off with that … that … punta.”

Anita was doubly shocked. First, she was not accustomed to hearing her sister use such strong language. Second, and more importantly, the news that her brother-in-law had left her sister for another woman was beyond belief. They had been so happy from such a young age. They raised their kids and seemed to be living an ideal life. At least it seemed so the last time Anita saw her sister five years ago.

“What? Jorge?” Anita asked. “He left.”

“Yes, he left.” She spat. “Just so he could fuck her. That little bitch.”

“Elena!” Anita cautioned her older sibling.

“I can’t help it. I ate that little punta more than you can imagine.” Elena continued. “May she die and rot in hell.”

Seeing her sister suffering, Anita knew it was her turn to provide support. She picked up her water glass and took a drink as she tried to decide what to say next.

“Do you know this woman?” She asked.

“Know her? Of course I know her.” Elena said viciously. “It’s Maria.”

“Our sister, Maria?” Anita asked in disbelief. “Oh my God.”

“You see why I hate her?” Elena continued. “The little bitch stole her own sister’s husband.”

“What about Michael?” Anita asked.

“He left.” Elena stated flatly and then added in a not-so-nice tone. “Just after you did.”

While the sisters were engaged in their conversation, they did not notice that two gentlemen had been seated in the booth directly behind Anita.

“It gets worse.” Elena continued. “That bitch convinced Rebecca that I made Jorge leave.”

“What?” Questioned Anita totally stunned.

“So, that’s why I came to see you.” Elena said. “Then when I saw how you were living I decided that if I helped you I wouldn’t have to think about them.”

Anita barely heard what her sister was saying. Her attention was drawn to the conversation behind her.

“Why would I blow up the Pepsi Center?” Ron said. “I told you, it was that Frankie guy.”

“Frankie?” The other voice asked. “Who’s Frankie?”

“Frankie, you know the guy I shot.” Ron said. “Jesus Christ, what kind of reporter are you? I am trying to give you an exclusive and you aren’t even listening to me.”

Anita’s head was spinning. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Feeling her blood begin to boil, she knew what was happening. It was the familiar feeling she always got when a story was presenting itself. Her reporter sense told her that this wasn’t just some story. This could actually be the story. The story that could make up for her debacle the night it happened. The story behind the big story. The story that could bring her back. She couldn’t believe her luck. For some reason, they had chosen this restaurant on this day. Right behind her was Ron Harrison, the man accused of blowing up the Pepsi Center. This couldn’t just be luck.

“… so I say, Maria you take him.” Elena was saying. “Nitti, are you listening to me?”

“Of course, I am.” Anita said. “You told Maria to go ahead and take him.”

“Yes, and …” Elena went back to her story confident that she had her sister’s attention.

Anita continued listening to the conversation behind her. She could tell by the tone of his voice that Ron was getting impatient. The other was barely listening.

“What a dumbass.” Anita thought. “This guy is sitting on the biggest story to ever hit Denver, maybe even the country and he is blowing the guy off. And for what? A free lunch?”

Chad returned and took their order. The sisters continued through lunch with Elena pouring her heart out to her sister. The entire time, Anita was listening to Ron’s story. Even more convinced that he had a story, she began to formulate how she could get separation from Elena without appearing to be unsupportive. Her sister had help her over the past two weeks and she want to reciprocate. But she wanted this story. No, she had to have this story.

Finally she decided that she would wait until Ron left, excuse herself and follow him. She could do it. Her confidence building on the scent of the story, she knew that she could do it and not hurt Elena’s feelings.

“So, is it okay if I stay with you for a while?” Elena asked nervously.

“Oh course Lena.” Anita said compassionately. “You can stay as long as you want. I am here for you.

Just as she finished, Ron stood up and walked toward the door. Everything about him betrayed his frustration with his lunch companion.

“Hey, Lena.” Anita said. “I just remembered that I was supposed to go by the station and get my stuff and I never did.”

“Okay, I’ll go with you.” Elena responded.

This could have been a problem, but Anita had already anticipated her offer.

“I don’t know Lena.” Anita started as she started to get up. “It could get a little weird.”

“I suppose.” Elena agreed. “So, I’ll see you back at the apartment?”

“Yeah.” She replied as she put on her coat and hurried out the door.

Once she was out on the sidewalk, it only took her a few seconds to spot Ron. He was so big that he stood out in a crowd. She stepped up her pace. Luckily, he had to pause at a crosswalk.

“Excuse me, Mr. Harrison.” Anita called out.

He turned and looked at her. His expression told her that he did recognize her, but the couldn’t place the context.

“Hi, I’m Anita Sanchez.” Anita said. “I use to be the anchor on News 4.”

“Oh, that’s why you look so familiar.” Ron said. “What can I do for you.”

“Well, I am doing the freelance thing now.” Anita explained. “I noticed that no one has gotten your story out yet. I was wondering if you would be interested in talking to me.”

“Interested?” He asked. “When do we start?”

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As the bus rolled down the highway, Ass and Ben retired to the back so that they could continue their conversation in private. Ronnie, Pete and Schnieder stayed at the front.

“Hey, you know what time it is?” Pete asked. “420, baby.”

“Oh, yeah.” Schnieder agreed as he reached into the breast pocket of his t-shirt. “Already have one rolled.”

Pete stood up and took the joint from Schnieder’s hand and in one motion he placed it between his lips and lit it. Inhaling deeply, he filled his lungs with smoke. Then he passed the joint to Schnieder.

“So, you still not smoking.” Pete asked Ronnie as he expelled a copious amount of smoke.

“Dude, it’s not like I’m taking a break.” Ronnie responded. “We had this conversation after that show in Grand Junction. If we are going to make it, I gotta be sober.”

Pete waited for Schnieder to finish inhaling and pass the joint back to him.

“Jesus, Schnieder you gonna fuck that joint after you get done making out with it?” Pete asked sarcastically.

Schnieder just passed it back without responding. After a moment of silence, Pete jumped as a thought ran through his head.

“Did I tell you guys my idea for making us millionaires?” He asked the other two.”

“Become rock stars?” Schnieder asked.

“Well, that and…” He paused for effect. “Fabreeze disposable underwear.”

Completely taken by surprise, Ronnie and Schnieder burst out laughing.

“What the fuck?” Ronnie exclaimed.

““Fabreeze disposable underwear.” He repeated as he handed the joint to Schnieder. “Think about it. Every time you fart it smells like Fabreeze.”

“And that is desirable?” Ronnie questioned.

Pete took the joint back. Considered it, took a hit, blew out the smoke and handed it back to Schnieder.

“Yeah, think about it.” Pete explained. “You can fart with impunity. No one will ever smell it.”

“But why disposable?” Ronnie asked.

“It’s not like I haven’t thought this through, dude.” He continued. “The Fabreeze would wash out.”

“Good point.” Ronnie said.

“Yeah and you could have pine scented, too.” Schnieder added.

Ronnie and Pete just looked at each other. Schnieder just missed the point of things sometimes. There was a pregnant pause.

“So, whaddya think about Ass and Ben?” Pete asked.

“Crazy.” Ronnie responded. “Never thought we’d have a conversation like that.”

“Straight up.” Schnieder added.

“Think they’ll hook up?” Pete continued.

“They pretty much already have, doncha think?” Ronnie answered the question with one of his own. “You okay with it if they do?

“Why would I care, dude?” Pete responded. “Ben’s always been gay and that didn’t matter.”

“I hear ya.” Ronnie said.
The conversation was overtaken by another lull. Once again a random thought popped into Pete’s brain.

“Sup with you and that Annie?”

“Aw, dude.” Ronnie replied. “It’s really been bumming me out. That’s why I been in such a shit mood on this trip.”

“You guys split up?” Pete asked.

“Not sure.” Ronnie respond. “Okay here’s the deal. Strap in, this is going to take a while.”

“Okay, shoot.” Pete said.

Pete settled in on the couch and awaited Ronnie’s story.

“Okay, so we are getting on the other night.” Ronnie started. “We’ve never done it before, right. But things are getting hot and she doesn’t stop me. So, I reach down and feel and she’s not real wet right. So I reach in my pocket and get some KY.

“You keep KY in your pocket?” Pete asked.

“Well, yeah.” Ronnie replied. “If I think I might have sex. If there’s one thing I got from my old man, it’s his dick.”

“Oh yeah, I forgot.” Pete responded. “The infamous Harrison pecker. Better not be flashing that in front of the boys back there.”

“Jesus, dude.” Ronnie admonished.

“It’s a fucking joke.” Pete said defensively.

“Whatever.” Ronnie said then continued. “So, I put on the KY. And I slide it in and she just stiffens up. Which again, I am used to because, you know.”

“Yeah, the pecker.” Pete said as he rolled his eyes.

“Anyway, I figure she’ll loosen up in a minute after I get going. It never happens.”

“So, what did you do?” Pete asked.

“Well, I finished.” Ronnie continued. “But here’s where it gets weird. She starts balling her eyes out. Not just a little. I mean, like sobs.”

“What the fuck?” Pete asked.

Ronnie stood up, stretched and walked over to the refrigerator. He opened the door and extracted a bottle of water.

“Here’s where the story gets really fucked up.” Ronnie said. “She tells me that she was a virgin, which I didn’t know.”

“A 22-year old virgin.” Schnieder said. “Are you fucking kidding me?”

“No, but it gets even harder to believe.” Ronnie said. “She told me why she was still a virgin.”

Ronnie evaluated whether or not he wanted to tell the story. Looking at his two friends he decided it would be for the best.

“So, her old man gets knocked off in Desert Storm.” Ronnie said. “And when Mom gets over it, she remarries. Well, Annie likes the dude, too. And not like a daddy. Anyway, mom goes on a trip and Annie decides to seduce her step dad.

“Holy shit.” Pete said. “How old was she?”

“Like 16 or 17.” Ronnie said trying to remember the details. “He doesn’t wanna have anything to do with it. So, she gets pissed and decides to make him pay. She reports him for rape.”

“That’s fucked up.” Pete said. “No wonder you broke up with her.”

“Hang a sec, dude.” Ronnie said. “Anyway, while the police are investigating the whole thing, they get a DNA match on the guy.”

“What did he do?” Schnieder asked.

“Turns out, in the five years he had been living there, he rapped and killed five girls.”

“HOLY SHIT!” Pete said.

“You’re fucking kidding.” “Schnieder added.

“No, I'm not.” Ronnie said. “The kicker is that each of the girls was the same age as Annie when he did it to them.


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Copyright (c) 2006 Paul Gavin. All rights reserved.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Foiled again

Unfortunately, HDNet decided to pass on my BIG Idea. But I tell you what - it was one of the nicest, most professional rejection letters I ever received. I am very impressed that they got back to me so quickly, especially with a rejection. HDNet is a class outfit.

Here's a copy of the response I received:

Paul,

Thank you for your interest in HDNet and your obvious passion for Blogging.

Although we found your concept compelling, we are unable to enter into
production on your material at this time.

We wish you the best of luck with your series.

Warmest Regards,

Lucia F. McCalmont
Program Acquisitions
2909 Taylor Street
Dallas, TX 75226
Phone: (214) 672-1748
Fax: (214) 571-9225
e-mail: lm@hd.net

Buy your favorite HDNet shows! Check out the latest avails in both D-VHS and
Windows Media HD-DVD:
http://store.yahoo.com/hdnet-store/wimehddv.html